The X-Entertainment Blog

02/28/2005: Mini Movie Reviews.

Another Miniature Movie Review: Finally caught the third Harry Potter flick. Though all three were amaaazing movies that have probably shaped more childhoods that they’re given credit for (Let’s face it, not everyone reads books.), I still think the second was the best of the lot. The third, I dunno…kinda feels like this particular story read better than it played out onscreen. Don’t want to nitpick since they’re all great movies, and anything that makes me see Robbie Coltrane for more than his cameo role in the Haim-driven Oh, What I Night is a gooood thing.

Another Miniature Movie Review: I take it back: Friday the 13th Part V wasn’t that bad. Definitely not the worst in the series, at least. The Michael Jackson wannabe sharing a duet with his girlfriend while shitting in the outhouse is worth the price of admission alone. “Damn those enchiladas?” Plus, I’m pretty sure that said wannabe’s younger brother was played by none other than “Dudley” of Diff’rent Strokes fame. I’m sure he’d love to be referred to only as “Dudley.” There’s even a Tina Yothers look-a-like with punkish black streaks in her hair who robot dances for like six hours straight before the fake Jason finally wanders in and kills her. These are strong points for a film even devoted F13 fans seem to hate by and large.

Another Miniature Movie Review: The more foreign-based Trekkies 2 wasn’t nearly as fun as the original, but revisiting some of the chief fanatics from the first documentary makes it a worthy watch. Gabe, the mulleted kid from the original, turned out a-okay and was probably an uplifting object for thousands of other nerdy-types wondering if they’d ever get their freak off.

Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

This is going to sound made up but it is absolutely true: The "Oooo Baby" song/exchange from FRIDAY THE 13th Part 5 was on my answering machine in college. Very confusing when strangers called.
P.S. that guy is also in RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD as "the black guy." HI-LARIOUS!
I don’t know man, it is pretty bad. I like it when the girl is dancing for 5 minutes for no reason or when Reggie screams like a girl.

Forgot to mention the HARRY POTTER stuff. Not that it needs saying but that particular movie was a pale shadow of the book (I know, what book isn’t). But that movie left out some KEY points that make absolutely no sense if they are just seen in the movie. Examples: 1. Who are Padfoot, Mooney, Prongs, and Wormtail.
2. What is the significance of Harry’s patronus being a stag. It’s in the book but not even mentioned in the movie. Shoddy.

Ouch. I did misuse some punctuation there myself (no question mark for the Harry Potter question). Hopefully, I won’t feel your wrath….
How are things at Nick?

Excellent, actually — if watching this week, keep an eye out for a giveaway that gives away yo-yos. Really.

Nice.
(make sure you delete all of this stuff, especially this next one because it is extra gay): Thanks for keeping the site up even though you are working now.
Did you ever finish that tape I sent you 40 years ago?
Also, you will appreciate this, Dusty Rhodes is doing a ton of commericals for a local car dealership down here. Quality all the way.

I feel kinda weird sitting here. Its like I’m staring at 2 people have a conversation and then they catch me and i run away screaming like a girl.

Oh yeah. Manimal thats not gay. I wish I had the drive to keep up a website and hold down a full-time job.

See, that’s why I get upset when people get bitchy about the Christmas stuff still up…Matt has a FULL-TIME job, and besides, you’re still getting updates, aren’t you? Yeah, that’s what I thought!

Any-what…I just got moved into a house, def. a big step up from my former shit-hole apt. Now my cats can get lost in the basement, and I won’t see them for a week! Rock!

I just d/l’d a comic book adaptation of Army of Darkness, a 3-parter that was released right before the movie, by Dark Horse comics. It’s awesome!

And to the poster the other day asking for another review of the Corey Haim video diary: Man, you don’t need another review. Matt had it down in the first two he wrote. All that’s left for you now is to find that bitch and watch it up…on smack! That’s what it makes me want to do every time I watch it!

TRAJEAL New King Book Alert!! "The Colorado Kid" due in Oct. 2005!! Yeah, I’m shitting my pants…and, for an added bonus, I can actually read this one! Yeah, I’m still dragging my heels on that last book. Besides the fact that I just moved and I couldn’t find it right now if I wanted to!

Oh yeah. Manimal thats not gay. I wish I had the drive to keep up a website and hold down a full-time job.
Posted by Fignutsion @ 02/28/2005 10:45 PM EST

No, but me thanking him is a little too sweet maybe. Also, the "that is so gay" has recently slipped back into my vocabulary (been absent since 10th grade) because of the CLERKS animated series. Everyone, please don’t think me un-Enlightened.

The Harry Potter films are pretty darn cool.. although I’m looking forward to Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe a lot more in terms of "book" movies.

Yeah, "Azkaban" was a weak film, IMO. The tone is so different, though, that is just didn’t feel like the other movies. None of the movies have captured what I imagine the world of the books to be like, IMO.

I’m waiting for the fourth film. It better be at least 3 hours long, or 2 different films. Way too much to cover. It should start getting REALLY dark, too. I don’t want to spoil anything, but the ending of Book four is pretty messed up.

I’ll admit I don’t know the full details, but I think Matt has said in the past that someone else does the main page layouts for him, and he just uploads them….so Matt isn’t the one to blame. It’s that other guy. Fire that other guy!

I tried to avoid the Harry Potter movies as much as I could, but there’s this crappy thing called fate that make us face what we always were supposed to.

So I checked the movies and I thought they weren’t as bad as I hoped for, but still it’s not my kind of stuff. Plus Hermione sounds and feels like Hemorroid to me…

Wow! Im surprised how few people are posting lately. Just picture how silly they’re all gonna feel when they realise that they’ve been missing entries for so long.. reminds me of when I first found the site and didn’t know you posted in the blog, even when no new articles were up.
Well, at least you can see who actually visits the site on a regular basis, updates or not. ;) I still haven’t gotten through all the old posts yet. (and probably never will, there’s too many!)

I only post when I have something to say. Like now. See I…well, wanted to say I only post when I have something to say. There.

I noticed that too, Cynaide. It seems like the ones have the most comments usually have a poll that’s totally unrelated to the article he posted. I always found that kind of undermined whatever Matt posted.

That was a pretty odd Jason movie. Loved that scene with the guy on the toilet. Almost as good as Sleepaway Camp. I am so sick of that Harry Potter movie though. I work at Wal-Mart in electronics and must have seen it three or four times a shift when it first came out. Ugh!

"Wizard People, Dear Reader is an unauthorized re-envisioning of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, by Brad Neely. To experience it, viewers need to get a copy of the first Harry Potter movie (known as Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone in Europe) and watch it with the sound off, replacing Neely’s narration with the original soundtrack.

After spreading rapidly among Neely’s friends in Austin, Wizard People made its theatrical debut at the New York Underground Film Festival, to rapturous applause. We think Neely has crafted an as-of-yet-unnamed new art form, one everyone should experience for themselves. (Wizard People has no affiliation with Warner Brothers or the creators of Harry Potter.)"

Doc, if you know of anyone that lives near the Boston area, Coollidge Corner Theatre is showing Wizard People: Dear Readers again this weekend:
http://coolidge.org/s_ser_mid.html

Haven’t seen the other two, but I did finally catch up with the third Harry Potter movie a couple of months ago and actually enjoyed it. I’ve read the books but am not a HUGE Potter fan. Even so, I found the movie to be enjoyable…but you still may need to read at least some of the book to fully understand the plot.

And Hermoine is my favorite character, an intelligent and strong girl amid boys who are sometimes the above, sometimes not.

On Hermione, I luv that SNL sketch in which Lindsay Lohan plays Hermione, and apparently Hermione’s gone through puberty. Now excuse me while I go beat my Bludger.

I love the Harry Potter books, but never could watch the movies. The kids are too ugly, creepy for me to watch for 2+ hours. Especially the Ron Weasly one. Not to be mean or anything, but still.

First two Harry Potter movies probably suck and blow simultaneously, so being different helps. If I ever have to watch a HP movie I’d watch the 3rd.

J.K. says that number 3 is her favorite of the movies so far, which kind of surprised me. I think as a stand alone movie it is far better than the first two, in terms of SFX, direction and acting, but as an adaptation…not so much. I think Cuaron did a really good job of capturing all the teen hormones and angst but I think he went a little too far and prematurely aged the characters. (Speaking of prematurely aging, somebody get me the number for Lohan’s plastic surgeon. Hee!) I also think Chamber (2) is the best overall.
As a die hard fan, I go in expecting a lot of details to be trimmed, but some of the omissions were just too big to ignore (as per Manimal’s post). I can let the little fannish nitpicks go (What’s with the giant clock tower we’ve never seen before? Why isn’t anybody EVER wearing their robes? Pebbles in the pumpkin patch?) but when you completely omit and/or warp important storylines it is very annoying.
Bad news, Cameron T. Apparently Cuaron’s biggest contribution to the next movie (which is being directed by someone else) was convincing them to cut it down to one movie, since they were originally going to make two. I’m look forward to more time-elapse montages and minimal screen time for the Baubaxton’s kids.
Haven’t caught the yo-yo ad yet, but I’m dying to win that Spongebob prize pack. I don’t even care about the big screen (okay, I do) but I want that DVD collection.

Mmm-mm, them’s a whole lot of bite sized updates. Yes, I’m hungry. When you’re hungry, everything is bite-sized to some degree.
In actually related news, I haven’t seen HP3, though the book remains my favourite so far. Not that I’m much of a fan or anything. I’ve read the books several times over and still don’t understand how they got to be so popular. Meh.

I need a t-shirt that says "I liked Spongebob when he was underground." ‘Cause that’d rock.

I agree with Manimal and squee4242- The plot omissions from HP3 were too big…I went with friends who hadn’t read the book, and they were seriously confused…and we’re in our 20’s= what about the poor KIDS who haven’t read the book? That being said, I still liked the tone of the movie and the flick overall. Can’t wait for the 4th one, as Goblet of Fire is my favorite HP book, and it should start to get darker and more adult. That movie better be a loooong one though, to fit everything in!

Matt- Don’t feel bad about the Xmas stuff on the site. Here in Korea, half - hell, OVER half, of the businesses still have their Xmas decorations up- lights, trees, the whole she-bang. I kinda like passing Xmas trees on my way to work every morning!… And nothing would deter my love for your site

I agree with everyone here. HP 3 was one of my favorite books ever, and I read a lot. I sat through the movie and kept on thinking, "They’re at this part already! But they skipped completely over…" Especially all the background stuff explaining Harry’s father’s days at school and Snape’s animosity towards Harry.

I think that the third HP movie was actually my favorite, though they’re all damn good. So far the fourth book in the series has been my favorite, so I can’t wait to see that movie. Or til the 6th book finally comes out this summer!

And not to be nitpicky, but since it’s March now and XE still has a Christmas theme, I say make it Christmas year-round. Why the hell not?

If it makes anyone feel any better, my Christmas Tree is STILL standing, and it’s REAL. Seriously.

But, the longer the site design stagnates, the more I know the "next shift" needs to be good. I have some excellent, DIFFERENT stuff planned — wouldn’t call it a whole new X-E, but I’ll say this: there will be a reason to check out daily again, soon. Actually, there will be more than one reason.

Oooo. Matt’s teasing his audience again. Is the tree still alive or is it all brown and dried up? I wouldn’t mind seeing a picture.

Prisoner of Azkaban (HP3), so far, has been my favorite of the five books. I also can’t wait for the 6th book this summer. Matt, of the five books, which one is your favorite?

Are you KIDDING ME?! I thought the second one was absolutely PATHETIC. It was so terrible. Bleck! Ah, well, I still think you’re awesome.

And I too would like to see a pic of your Christmas tree, Matt! Does your cat try and get all up in that? Mine always do, so now we don’t have trees anymore.

FYI-
Shavar Ross who played Dudley on Diff’rent Strokes was indeed in Friday the 13th Part V. Sorry Manimal, but he was not in Return of the Living Dead. He was in "What’s Love Got to Do with It" as Michael Turner.

http://chud.com/interviews/1764
"It was the Nickelodeon awards and she, at the time Pokemon was really happening. And she had this concept where she wanted to dance with Pikachu. It was all about her dancing with Pokemon. But Nickelodeon isn’t Pokemon, they are Rugrats. So they were saying, ‘No, you have to dance with Rugrats.’ So I talked to my DP or whatever and I walked over and there’s Jennifer literally sitting in the director’s chair with her legs up, arms open, [drunk voice] ‘No fucking way am I dancing with a fucking Rugrat. I wanna dance with Pikachu. I dance with Pikachu or I dance with no one.’ And that is God’s truth. And I literally was like ‘J-Lo.’"

Just to let Matt know. On 3/20 the CBS Sunday Movie will be Spring Break Shark Arrack. Sharks appear to invade spring break or something. Looks to be funny in a bad way.

OK…so I hate to shill for myself…well, I don’t but I have to say that in order to look like I don’t want to be a shill for myself…what?

Anyways, let me start at the beginning. At my work, we have a pool based on Survivor where people have a character…and blah blah blah. So I started writing these recaps and they got a pretty good response. So I am on this freelance writer’s board where they are posting jobs for writers who are also fans of the show for this start-up fansite. Anyways, I submitted and now they are paying me for this stuff…

Anyways, I am posting it here, because, well, I have run out of things to say about Gremlins colorforms and I know you guys have pretty good (or at least good in the sense that mine is also good) taste….

So, the more people that read my recaps, the better the chance of me continually getting paid…So take a look..
http://www.survivorpw.pw/

My article is the "SURVIVOR PALAU: EPISODE II: RATS! THIS SHOW IS STILL ON THE AIR?" article…chock full of sardonic wit.

Also,
I definitely feel Prisoner of Azkaban was the best of the HP movies so far. I agree a lot has been left out of the books so with each movie - the second being the one that left out the least. But the second one, I feel, didn’t work because it just moved at a weird pace for me. I liked it, but definitely not as much as one or two.

Hey Matt, Why don’t you put a section where we can post links sort of like fark.com or milk and cookies? If you had a way of auto-posting them then there would be another reason to check out the page every day. It would be great for when you get "a little" busy now and then.
Just an idea.. what do you guys think?

Slight miscommunication. I was not referring to Dudley/Reggie aka Shavar Ross.
I was referring to the black guy in the outhouse, Demon. His real name is Migel A. Nunez Jr. He was in both Friday the 13th part 5 and RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD.
http://www.fridaythe13thfilms....om/saga/part5/miguelnunez.html

Hello peoples! Sorry it’s been a long time in the void, but a couple or more Thursdays ago, the iMac at work decided to sink slowly in the west and had to be sent upstate for rehab. It’s back in town, but the ‘net folks are needing to run a few more checks and such before the gumdrop can be ok’d. I’m just sending a quick yelp from the local library to let you know I’m suffering from X-withdrawal. Next post when it happens! Spiders on my brain……

King is back! All hail the return of the King! The new XE got me so excited I peed myself. In fact thinking about it now almost made me do it again … dang it ! Stupid power of suggestion.

I’m dancing around my room! A new X-E!!! Yyyyyaaaaayyyyy!!!! OK, so it’s gonna be sorta new. Oh well. At least Matt’s finally acknowledging that the layout needs to change. And it looks like he’ll keep the fans that are still reading, and possibly gain soem new ones. And a reason (or two) to check daily? Oh my. When’s the las time Matt had daily updates. Not since I’ve been reading, which has been since 2001, just after Robert Berry left and it was all on Matt.

I am holding out until I see the already available theatrical trailer (supposedly inferior) in an actual theatre with a big screen, but if anyone wants to watch the exclusive internet trailer (supposedly superior) of Hitchhiker’s: HG2TG

Cool, ME. I watched the Amazon exclusive HGTTG trailer a few weeks back, but this appears to be new…now that it’s finally loaded, I can see that it’s mostly the same footage from the other trailer but it’s presented in a much more fun way. (My thoughts on the first trailer here, where, yes, I make a gratitious Harry Potter reference.)
I’ve been thinking about why Chamber of Secrets is my favorite of the movies (can’t speak for anyone else) and I think there are two main reasons. Firstly, the basilisk is pretty darn scary. The biggie though, is Dobby. Not to compare him with Gollum (or even Jar Jar), because it’s not the computer effects that are so extraordinarily great necessarily, but that he’s so perfectly adapted from the book, like he stepped right out of the pages. God that’s corny. Anyway, I can’t wait to see what they do with Winky.

Actually, I suppose if you count the Halloween and X-Mas countdowns, then you sort of have daily updates there (sort of). But other than that, there really haven’t been daily updates. Overall, all I’ve ever seen on X-E are sporadic updates, which could be more than once a week or once over a period of 3 weeks. So I’m really wondering what Matt’s got in store for us. I’ll believe it when I see it, Matt.

Another thing I should mention is that if Matt actually does what he promises, it’ll be like the return of red M&Ms. Mmmm…red M&Ms!

Gotta say Matt, that I totally empathize with the Christmas tree still being up. I think the longest the husband and I went was late April, early May and that was last year. I know it was after Easter till the damn thing was down - and yes it was a live tree - emphasis on WAS. It got to the point that you could hear the needles falling when you came in the door (they made a tinkling sound - like a rain stick). Funny but not, I know. The last of the actual Christmas decorations came down in June. My family mocked me mercilessly. They stopped by unexpectedly and I was too embarrassed to let them in the house – cause the tree was still there in all it’s dried out stately glory. We sat on the porch furniture and chatted uncomfortably until they gave up and went home. This year I did much better, getting the tree (live again) out by the 10th of February. Soooo - keep that tree up! I salute you!

And also - New X-E!!! I have to go find someplace quiet so I can be alone with my… err… excitement. Yay Matt!

onslaught86 - I need a t-shirt that says "I liked Spongebob when he was underground." ‘Cause that’d rock.

The best thing in the world is inkjet iron-on tranfers. I have 15+ shirts of things that I came up with in my screwy little head. Not to mention, if you can find some discount t’s (I’ve found them for as little as 10 for $10), each shirt ends up costing around $3. Fifteen bucks for a Piggly Wiggly shirt? I think not!

We still have our Xmas tree up in our apartment….with all the things we got still underneath….when I want to watch my "Little Monsters" dvd, I go the pile under the tree, watch it, then put it back on the pile….there’s something wrong with this, isn’t there???

Holy shit, really, Kidneyboy? Is it something he wrote before and never published, or is it something new? I’m excited now.

I just now realized my tree’s still up too (it’s fake at least) and there are still wrapped presents under there for the people who flaked.

Kidneyboy, I’ll be checking out StephenKing.com. I think I had signed up for the newsletter, but I never switched over when we changed internet accounts (thankfully, I don’t have to worry about that now, since I have everything through mailblocks.com). How far did you get in Book VII? Did you read any of it? What do you think about them making a gunslinger movie? Who would you want to play Roalnd? Someone who could start off young and look older as the movie progresses, since he ages ten years after his meeting w/ Walter. Who’s a young version of Clint Eastwood? I don’t even think there are any. Maybe Clancy Brown? Of course, I would use any excuse to see Mr. Krabs in as many projects as possible. Sigh…

Erik, I haven’t read any back posts. Do you guys know what you’re having yet? Are you waiting to do the nursery until you know. or do you have a color scheme? Let me know. I have some ideas already. My email is in my name. You email me first!

I have a question for you guys. Do you think ice cream sodas are a good dessert for a party? I’m hosting our monthly Bunco game (a cross between Yahtzee and Pitch), and I was thinking about doing ice cream sodas for a dessert, but since there’s no preperation, I don’t know if that looks cheesy. I have a bunch of tall cups and long spoons, and I’m going to get chocolate and vanilla ice cream. Then I’m going to have a few sodas, like orange, cream, root beer, and Pepsi (my favorite, w/ vanilla ice cream). I’ll probably grab some chocolate and butterscotch, whipped cream and cherries. But, everyone will have to make them themselves. What do you all think?

Actually got up early this morning, don’t know why! Oh well, plenty of crap to watch today, I just d/l’d "Freaks", I haven’t seen that one in a while. It’s pretty weird, actual circus freaks are kind of creepy, but they are human just like anyone else, and this movie showcases that to a "T".

Well, I tried to close the bold print, but no such luck…Matt? Little help for the blog-ingly challegened? hehe.

Traj, ice cream sodas sound perfect for a game party. Throw in some creme de menthe or peppermint schnappy or what have you, and it will be one wild-ass Bunco party. BTW, I’ve heard the name Bunco, it sounds so familiar, but I can’t quite place it. Bunco Squad is for fraud, bbut I think that means "bunk-o" like something is bunk…yeah, I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about, but have a great party!

I’ve tried closing the tags in the next post, too, but it’s never worked before. Nice try, though.

I love Freaks. Creee-eepy. When they all chant, "One of us! One of us!" They would have never gotten away w/ making a movie like that nowadays, w/ real freaks. Exploitation, and all that. They’d rather use CGI and regular (pretty) actors than give actual disabled people work.

For the Bunco illiterate (which is probably everyone except me - I’m so "cool"): http://www.buncorules.com/

Hey Matt-
Just change that little top part to "X-Entertainment’s 2005 Christmas season is here!" and we’ll be ahead of the game. It’s not last year, it’s this year.

Traj, I am sure glad to see you posting again! You and kingklash have been gone for a while, yo!

The book ’tis new, I guess, and will be put out on some small mystery press thing, IIRC. I’m on an email list from http://www.StephenKing.com and they sent me the heads-up.

Hope everythings going all right in your neck of the woods. I just got moved into a new-old house, so I got that goin for me. I just bought "She-Devil" for $3 so I’m doing all right. Made my day!

Kidneyboy, after racking my brain (because it sounded familiar to me too) all I can come up with is Sergeant Bilko, the old sitcom/newer movie.

(Traj, I assume you’re leaving Carnivale out of that statement about disabled actors since they just hired the actress with ectrodactyly (lobster claw) syndrome. And I’ve never seen any other show write a dramatic fight scene for a triple amputee either. PS: Hi, how ya been, missed ya tons)

This is a long shot, but if ANYONE has the March issue of Elle magazine you must turn to page 268 right now. Charmies are back! Except now they’re made by Coach and cost between $40 and $50 each. Seriously, they call them "key fobs" and there’s a little heart, a tiny book, a damn slice of watermelon and a beach sandal!! I can totally picture the little toilet hanging there with the rest of them. (I’ll try to scan in the picture since my description doesn’t do it justice and only my fellow X-E bloggers would appreciate it. )

$50? Seriously? That’s insane! For a key fob? Who’s going to pay that? Are they plastic?

Yeah, I don’t count Carnivale b/c it’s not a mainstream show, and it’s only shown on HBO, so it’s not seen by as many people. They don’t hold themselves to the same standards as people who are looking to make a killing in the box office. They’re more willing to take risks and not worry so much about being politically correct. It’s ok for C.S.I. to show rotting, mutilated bodies, but heaven forbid they have a microcephalic played by an actual pinhead. (Not that they’re great actors, but you get my point)

Have you written anymore fanfic? Any ideas? Jonesy was my favorite subject, but the idea of him and Libby together totally turns me off from him. I’m thinking about something from Stumpy’s POV, maybe a late night conversation w/ Dora Mae’s picture about his mess of a life. Maybe tonight’s ep (on at 10 instead of 9, don’t forget) will inspire me a bit more.

Okay, I’ve scanned in the pic here. My guess is that they’re made of leather rather than plastic, to justify the insane price tag. Everybody take a look at the pic, it’s great.

(On the fic front, I’m trying to get a weekly contest going but it’s going to be a hell of a lot of work and actually entails some cash out of my pocket and I’m just not sure there’s enough interest to support it. It’s on the burner though…)

Doesn’t anyone have any hobbies? Or just not participating in the poll because you prefer to rip on the x-e layout?

My two main hobbies are fixing up old honda motorcycles from the 60’s and collecting/playing original Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) stuff from the 80’s. Camping/hiking/fishing type activities would count, too, I suppose.

and since jimbalya is interested in hobbies im gonna have to say hell yes with most nintendo products and genesis also kicks ass

Uhh… people are replying to the hobby question in the next entry, where it was asked.

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This entry was posted on Monday, February 28th, 2005 at 9:44 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.