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02/18/2005: 30 Pieces of Star Wars Junk!

Here’s a big one, full of junk. It’s a smorgasbord of Star Wars crap, ranging from figural erasers to wallets, night lights to keychains and watches to more watches, all from the early `80s and all opened from their packages specifically for this article, and thus, C10 minty fresh. Thirty different items are featured, and at least five or six of the reviews are worth reading. Seeeee you later.

Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

Discussion Thread: 90 comments

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star wars star wars star wars star wars :jump:

Ghosted by melonian @ 02/20/2005 7:55 PM EST

Crescent fresh matt, another premo article. Dang, those erasers and combs are awesome!! Matt, I would totally sell enough organs, and excess toes to be in your will for all the goodies you have in your apartment, especially the Coach Potatoe. An what the hell George Lucas, you numb nut! From the first Star Wars toys to the most recent, the posability is not that far off from the erasers, when are you going to get it straight!! I always wind up using the stiff ass Star Wars toys as hostages for Cobra Commander when I play GI JOE. Crescent Fresh :]

Ghosted by Skynet1984 @ 02/20/2005 9:06 PM EST

Trajeal,
I don’t know what to say. That is very sweet of you. I guess the big question is, how would we go about something like this? Not to sound like a wet blanket (pun intended, unintended, whatever) but unlike Skynet1984, I am not too comfortable posting the old email up for everyone to see. Hmmm, ehhhh, *grasping at straws as to what to say*. MAniMaL noT goOD wITh wOrdS soMetimE. (Sorry for the ineloquence of this post. It was not as witty laden as my earlier post attempted to be.)

Ghosted by The Manimal @ 02/20/2005 10:36 PM EST

Matt, did you happen to, by any chance, see "Robot Chicken" that was just on Adult Swim? omg, I totally thought of you when it came on. Lots of animation involving figurines, such as Transformers. Good stuff.

Ghosted by Ryane @ 02/20/2005 11:49 PM EST

Very good article, Matt. It really got me in the spirit for Episode III. Let’s see if Lucas can redeem himself with this last one…

Ghosted by Dean @ 02/20/2005 11:51 PM EST

I think it was somebody here in the blog who correctly predicted the person coming out of the closet on the Simpsons? I can’t find it, but good call, whoever you were.
(Well, Traj, since you brought it up of course I was excited (though I was a little sad to see my best conspiracy theories go out the window with this week’s ep). I’m actually working on putting together a weekly fic challenge over in my LJ community, I just dunno if there’s going to be enough interest.)

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 02/21/2005 12:38 PM EST

Holy crap I want Batman!
Love Star Wars. Of course talking about the original trilogy. I’d like to find this stuff somewhere. Go to thrift stores around where I live all the time, no Star Wars stuff. Some cool things, but no SW. Oh well.

Ghosted by Chris @ 02/21/2005 1:07 AM EST

It was probably me, but I’d already heard it was Patty and there was Futurama-style evidence-dropping in past episodes. You can see her running from Le Mason Derierre in that one episode. Yes, that early an episode…

Ghosted by Mars @ 02/21/2005 2:08 AM EST

Quick rundown off the top of my head of episodes that foreshadowed Patty’s gaiety:
1. Marge offers the twins ballet tickets, Patty(?) snorts, "That’s girl’s stuff."
2. The aforementioned exit from Maison Derriere
3. The gay pride parade, the "still in the closet float" we hee one of the twins’ voice saying, "but don’t tell Mom and Dad" (that we are gay)
4. The coup de grace (?), her declination of Principal Skinner’s marriage proposal.
That last one was a missed opportunity last night. Skinner was at the wedding; seems logical that he would have SOME comment on the situation.
I’m sure that there are more, I just can’t think of any.
P.S. I am as surprised as anyone that I am on X-E at 7:30 AM on El Presidente Day. I should be out putting gifts under the Lincoln Memorial…

Ghosted by The Manimal @ 02/21/2005 7:58 AM EST

Manimal, you can email me your address (just click my name), unless you don’t want it floating around on the ‘net.

squee, I thought Ben was such a wussbag in this ep. "My laws, whassa man to do-a?" I think his deciding to side w/ Scudder is going to screw him in the long run, though. Although, now he can come into his full power, and Justin still needs to kill Scudder to come into his. Hmmm…

I’m off to sacrifice some history books to the Gods of President’s Past.

Ghosted by trajeal @ 02/21/2005 9:55 AM EST

Okay, WAYYYY off the subject here, but is anyone else still holding out some small bit of hope that we will EVER see what happened to Storm Shadow and Frack, Tunnel Rat and the Turtles, and Cobra’s Chia-Now-Rock Tumbler Plot???

Ghosted by bad karma @ 02/21/2005 10:02 AM EST

Trajeal, you are the greatest. EMajorwitz79@aol.com is my email and I’ll correspond to you about it.

Hey everybody, I don’t care, as long as you aren’t spamming me, you can email me.

Semper Fi,
Erik Majorwitz

Ghosted by EMajorwitz @ 02/21/2005 1:39 PM EST

ROBOT CHICKEN RULEZ! Where else will you see Kirk’s junk smashed in the auto doors? Thank you Seth Green, thank you so much.

Ghosted by PRIMUSBOY @ 02/21/2005 2:05 PM EST

I’ve gotta say Matt, this was one of your better recent articles. The smell of the erasers, the crappy vinyl wallets/billfolds, stoned Ewoks, so many memories. Awesome stuff. I to am surprised by the large number of combs. That was unexpected. I want one of those Darth-Vader-in-the-buffalo-stance wallets.

Ghosted by jhnnywalkr @ 02/21/2005 3:04 PM EST

And I also have to say, no, I doubt we will ever have an ending to the infamous Chia Plot. Perhaps it’s just as well. Maybe it’s like no knowing what was in the briefcase in Pulp Fiction. It’s whatever you want it to be. Or, maybe Matt will finish the story in 20 years, much like, well, Star Wars.

Ghosted by jhnnywalkr @ 02/21/2005 3:21 PM EST

I long for M80s.

Ghosted by RAS @ 02/21/2005 4:39 PM EST

Ah, the days before spirits were crushed with the hideous Episodes I and II.

Does anyone know where I can get that Yoda billfold, I must have it, its the coolest thing I’ve ever seen, ever.

Ghosted by -=--=- @ 02/21/2005 5:22 PM EST

I’m pretty sure that what Leia gave Wicket was delicious Monterey Jack cheese. At least, that’s what I always thought it was when I was a wee lad.

Every time I see that scene I want cheese.

Now you know.

Ghosted by blizack @ 02/21/2005 6:36 PM EST

Robot Chicken OWNS!!!!!!! It was everything I expected it to be. I was very very impressed. Matt you should become a writer for them because it is totally your schtick. Perhaps we could see an animated Chia Plot??? Or maybe those ghosts you were posting during halloween.

Ghosted by phunqsauce @ 02/21/2005 7:57 PM EST

That ruled! AND it took up the 20 minutes necessary to get me from having nothing to watch to a new episode of 24.

God bless you, Matt, and Star Wars.

Heh…the book I’m reading right now is a relic from 1980: A journal of the making of Empire Strikes Back. Good times.

Ghosted by Mike @ 02/21/2005 9:16 PM EST

I had the Royal Guard and Darth Vader erasers. I feel bad for kid who got the Bib Fortuna eraser. Why make anything else for that guy?

Ghosted by dfdfg @ 02/22/2005 5:16 AM EST

It was a RICE CAKE!

Ghosted by dfdfg @ 02/22/2005 5:31 AM EST

jhnnywalkr, Marsellus Wallace’s soul was in that briefcase on Pulp Fiction. So that’s at least ONE mystery solved!

Ghosted by bad karma @ 02/22/2005 8:02 AM EST

God, those erasers were awsome, especially Jabba Du Hutt! Damn the people that actually used those erasers. Damn them all to HELL…

Ghosted by Alex @ 02/22/2005 1:27 PM EST

Actually bad karma, I heard several theories on what was in the briefcase, but that one is my favorite. Some choices on Snopes are the diamonds from Reservior Dogs, the Oscar Tarantino wanted to win, a human ear, a human head, and a few others including an homage to an old movie where a briefcase contained a nuclear bomb. I’ve heard Tarantino in interviews say it’s what you think it is. He left it ambiguos on purpose, or so he claims.

Ghosted by jhnnywalkr @ 02/22/2005 3:13 PM EST

Watch the movie again, he pays a guy with gold foil wrapped money, the gold glow we see from out of the briefcase and why the two crazy kids were so eager to take it.

Ghosted by RAS @ 02/22/2005 4:10 PM EST

That Tarantino. Always making us think. Like in From Dusk Till Dawn, where I swear that halfway through writing the script he said to himself, "Self, wouldn’t it be cool if there were vampires, for no apparent reason, even though I haven’t even hinted about it for the past sixty pages?" But hey, anyone who likes The 5.6.7.8’s enough to put them in a movie is a) unbalanced and b) totally awesome.

*cough* Anyway, onto the article…Matt, you’ve done it again. You are just the cutest little ball of nostalgia, ever. The Princess Leia smiley face things at the end of each blurb totally did it for me. I don’t know why I found this article so cute, but it was cheek-pinchingly so.

I love how subject matters like these take your tone back to your childhood, in turn taking us all back with you. It brings out the child in you and that brings out the child in the rest of us. So with deepest gratitude from someone who couldn’t care less if Star Wars never existed but could still deeply appreciate this article, thank you.

Ghosted by Nikkii @ 02/22/2005 4:11 PM EST

hmm.. my post doesnt seem to have posted.. but anyways.. I always thought Leia was giving him a small brick of cheese. I mean, it looks kind of like cheese and there were no crunching noises. Also for some reason that scene always makes me want to eat cheese.

Ghosted by Toxicity- @ 02/23/2005 3:29 AM EST

Hey wouldn’t it be great if the guy who was inside the Akbar suit read this article and then mentioned it on his website?

Ahhh maybe not.

Ghosted by Sweetie @ 02/23/2005 4:15 PM EST

Just noticed that CLip Along reused the plastic packaging for their vader crayon sharpener and their Ewok plastic magnifying glass. Took me a couple seconds to figure out why the ewok needed an empty point in the packaging. Raise a glass to Penny-pinching!

Ghosted by TAK @ 02/23/2005 6:01 PM EST

You mean those things cost 99 cents at the time? Eesh, my dad was at a store in Wal-Mart and saw this bin full of godawful movie discs that were on sale for eighty cents each!

Ghosted by mjf7583 @ 02/24/2005 12:14 PM EST

We sell those for eighty eight cents at my (Canadian) Wal-Mart. I saw one I thought might be good for Matt because it had Mario Van Peebles. I dont know who he is or anything but Matt seemed to rave about him in a (I think it was) Jaws article?

Ghosted by Toxicity- @ 02/24/2005 12:24 PM EST

Damnit. After reading the article, I went and dug up the Gamorrean Guard and Max Rebo figural erasers that I got for fitty cents at a flea market, and took a whiff. Lucky the plastic bubble had helluva detiorated, otherwise I would’ve had to open the erasers to smell them. Aaand you’re right, they smell good.

The smell reminds me of something from my childhood, but I can’t put my finger on it. It’s not the erasers, I never had any of them as a kid (I was born in 1985). It’s driving me mad. I’m sniffing the erasers like every two minutes. There’s a childhood memory somewhere there, and I aims to find it.

Ghosted by Daniel @ 02/24/2005 4:13 AM EST

I actually own the R2-D2 toybox that you have a picture of there in the article. Found it at a yardsale.. it even has wheels so it rolls around!

Ghosted by hugsnstuff @ 03/03/2005 7:16 PM EST

Longtime reader, infrequent poster. Saaaaaay, did I miss last year’s Cobra Chia Pet Part IV, or did it not come out? I’d love to see the end – the toy comics hooked me on X-E a few years back and it’s what keeps me coming back for more!

Thanks,
Nate

Ghosted by Nate @ 03/04/2005 7:01 PM EST

hello matt and everyone involved with this site!
i appologize in advance for posting this here and not emailing you directly, but maybe other people feel the same as myself….i am a long time surfer, as well as a big fan/unofficial advertiser (amongst friends) of you’re site.
although, as of late ive been slacking ALOT and havent visited in quite some time.
now, i understand that this site needs money to stay up, and with all its success you needed more expensive means to keep it going. not to mention i love the new changes you’ve made with the look of the site; these changes are a direct result of you’re advertising profits im sure. but is it entirely necessary to have all these pop-ups that nearly flood my stupid computer?
im mostly referring to the ‘lord of the rings’ ad. i couldnt find the close button, i assume there is one but arg! egad! i couldnt find it! is it hidden to force us to watch the whole thing? it is only 10-15 seconds but all the same, i wish i had the option to close it out immediately if i so wish.
i dont mean for you to percieve this comment as discourteous, im just sharing my personal opinion on the subject…. and again i appolgize if i offended anyone…. i mean well
this turned out much longer than anticipated and i appologize for that as well ;oP
haltyne from miami beach

Ghosted by Haltyne @ 03/04/2005 11:56 PM EST

Get pop-up software whiner!

Ghosted by sixpointsix @ 03/08/2005 2:12 PM EST

I remember when I was a kid and collected/played with the Jedi figures…we couldnt find Vader ANYWHERE. Not Toys R Us, not Kay Bee, not fricking anywhere.

I used that Vader eraser as my Vader figure for like a year.

Ghosted by Big J @ 03/16/2005 6:31 PM EST

I still OWN the R2D2 toybox. It’s beat to hell, but survives to this day. Maybe someday I’ll restore it and give it to my kids to use (when I have kids).

Ghosted by t3knomanser @ 04/17/2007 11:52 AM EDT

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