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06/07/2004: The X-E Triple Book Review Club.

It’s time for X-E’s Triple Book Review, an article featuring a look back at…you guessed it, three books. On tap for today is Michelle’s Full House Activity Book, Grover’s The Monster at the end of this Book, and one of those cheapo dinosaur books all the boys used to get from elementary school book fairs. Hit the blog later for a few updates — got some reader mail to sort through and some more Shrek crap (sorry, it must be done) to post up. Not sure which’ll come first. I will flip an oversized novelty quarter soon enough.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 162 comments

Ohmigosh! It’s "The Monster At The End Of This Book!" I had that one, as well as the hide-and-seek one. Good times, good times.

Ghosted by Freezair @ 06/08/2004 2:52 AM EDT

Matt

Thanks for all the work and time you put into posting these articles. I get a lot of enjoyment out of them. And to think that we are all lucky enough that you have a new one up practically every 3 days. Wow! Good stuff.

BTW! Grover rocks, always has…always will.

Ghosted by Novaximus @ 06/08/2004 2:52 AM EDT

When the book fair came to my elementary school all those years ago, it was in the midst of the whole goosebumps thing…I have too many of them to this day.

But, they also sometimes had these anthologies of ‘true’ ghost stories and forteana topics which I totally dug. I’ve reread some of them since, and I was repeatedly exposed to some really brutal and satanic true crime stories.

That’s why I’m in a punk band now.

Ghosted by Cannibalizer @ 06/08/2004 2:53 AM EDT

Glorious, Matt! I still have that dinosaur sticker book too, along with a host of other dino stuff. In fact, in 2nd grade my obsession with dinosaurs got me featured in The Washington Post and on the cover of The Baltimore Sun… in living color. Hurrah for dinosaurs!

And the Grover book was… very interesting. :)

Ghosted by Wes @ 06/08/2004 3:56 AM EDT

Hey, first time caller, long time listener.

Holy Christ, The Monster At The End Of This Book. The book that firmly instilled the fear of Grover in my inner child. I still can’t look at Sesame Street with that onscreen without remembering "the fucked up Golden Book" I read way back when. Whatever the magical property this book possesses, it’s left a Grover-shaped hole in my brain that will never heal.

Kudos to you for bringing back my most irrational childhood fears back in review form.

Ghosted by wal-rus assault @ 06/08/2004 4:08 AM EDT

There’s a monster at the end of this…errrr…comment. In any case, I adored that book when I was a kid–it (along with the Pokey Little Puppy) was my favorite Golden Book. Blast from the past for me!

Ghosted by shelly @ 06/08/2004 6:54 AM EDT

baseball grease

Ghosted by zombone @ 06/08/2004 7:42 AM EDT

Nate, if you’re talking about typos at the end of the intro, yes.

If you’re talking about others, no. :(

Ghosted by Matt @ 06/08/2004 7:53 AM EDT

Great review Matt! I used to love that Grover book!
I guess I shouldn’t read your articles at work, though, since I tend to burst out laughing. Co-workers walk by and stare at me like I am deranged.

Ghosted by Nikki @ 06/08/2004 10:00 AM EDT

Does anybody remember the "My teacher is an alien" series of books? I remember getting a bunch of them at a book fair once. In the last one the kid went into space with his teacher on a big ass space ship.

Ghosted by Bright Noah @ 06/08/2004 11:22 AM EDT

Laughing out loud is no problem for me, everybody knows I’m deranged.

Zabagabee!

Ghosted by kingklash @ 06/08/2004 11:30 AM EDT

I uysed to LOVE "There’s a monster at the end of this book." I personal favorite part was when he built a brick wall over the page and when you turned it, the wall was a pile on top of Grover. Good times. I knew that demon Elmo would be trouble when he turned up in the sequel.

Ghosted by The Dragonrider @ 06/08/2004 11:57 AM EDT

Good call, DR — complete with the sloppy gray cement shit that forever made me slightly obsessed with brick.

Ghosted by Matt @ 06/08/2004 12:00 PM EDT

Bright Noah
Heck yeah i remember my teacher is an alien. i liked the second one the best.

Ghosted by john v @ 06/08/2004 12:28 PM EDT

I loved TMATEOTB (The Monster at the End of This Book). I was taken quite by surprise when grover was revealed to be the monster. I want the non-released unedited version in which Grover is mutilated and eaten by a giant Slor and he curses you with his dying breath.
Good times.

Ghosted by Stilewalker @ 06/08/2004 1:10 PM EDT

One of my favorite "Young Reader" books was called My Best Friends an Android, or My Andriod Son, or was it I Am an Andriod, and That Guy Built Me.
ANyway, the lonely professor builds an Andriod who he raises like a son. It is about his quirks and hijinks in school and of course stopping crime. They actually amde a TV series out of it. What the heck was that book?

Ghosted by Stilewalker @ 06/08/2004 1:14 PM EDT

In the "Trivia Fun" section of the Full House book, number 3 has two answers, A & C. Depends on which season you’re talking about. Yes, I feel really lame right now…

Ghosted by Katie @ 06/08/2004 1:28 PM EDT

Gover was really great when he was a waiter and annoyed the hell outta people, and never got fired! Heh, GOOD TIMES. By the by, I just saw the worst corey haim movie ever, The Backlot Murders. He plays a guy in a really bad band and gets himself killed only after fondling some chick, kinda gross. Stupid Corey Haim… BUT ITS ALL I GOT!!!

Ghosted by BettieBoo @ 06/08/2004 1:49 PM EDT

My stepsister had that Grover book. It was very clever.

There used to be a book/tape thing that would play different sounds depending on your choice in the choose your own adventure style book. There was one with Grover called "Don’t Push the Red Button." It ruled.

These should definitely be reviewed on X-E.

Ghosted by Ubu Rex @ 06/08/2004 3:31 PM EDT

Matt-LOL. That’s OK though. We all make typos. And I don’t think you should be so hard on yourself about your reading skills. You’re an awesome writer with an awesome style. You break the so-called rules regarding the press and go your own way. And it may be a simpler style in terms of grammar and vocabulary, but that doesn’t mean it’s lacking in sharp wit and extreme intelligence. Your writing has a way of cracking me up and admiring your cleverness. So please, DO NOT underestimate yourself.

Ghosted by Nate @ 06/08/2004 3:36 PM EDT

Matt: Why is there a secret link t Retro Crush hidden in the picture of Grover in the banner headline for the story?

Is this something that happens often in stories, and I have just now noticed?

Ghosted by Ubu Rex @ 06/08/2004 3:38 PM EDT

Oops. Typo.

"…admiring your cleverness." should be "…enabling me to admire your cleverness."

Ghosted by Nate @ 06/08/2004 3:39 PM EDT

Ubu, there’s a hidden link like that in almost all of the articles. (well, the ones from the past couple o months) Sometimes they’re offsite links, sometimes old articles, or sometimes something much stranger.

Ghosted by Egg Finder @ 06/08/2004 3:40 PM EDT

Heh, shows how observant I am. I haven’t been reading as much as I used to, for some reason.

I still miss the X-E forums.

Ghosted by Ubu Rex @ 06/08/2004 3:48 PM EDT

Once my sisters were watching Dinosaucers, and I was in the room asleep, and it kept getting into my dreams (they were playing soccer, I think), and I was trying to dream about an evil blond woman with an evil marionette and a nice vest, but dinosaurs playing soccer kept wandering in. I think it pissed her off.

Ghosted by Goz @ 06/08/2004 3:59 PM EDT

I think the fish are watching me. Anyway, I always likeded Grover. His enthusiasm in the face of his situations gave all us klutzy oafs everywhere hope. Super Grover rules! "And I’m cute, too!"

Ghosted by kingklash @ 06/08/2004 4:16 PM EDT

Does any one remember the Dinosaurs T. V. show?? With the smart ass baby??? THAT was a good show my friends…

Ghosted by Jerry Blank @ 06/08/2004 4:19 PM EDT

NOT THE MAMA! I still have the Sesame Street single "Things to do on a rainy day". I loved Grover, but that song can get stuck in your head and its really quite deranged. Just clap your hands with a clap clap clappy clap clappy clappy clap clap cloooooooooo!

Ghosted by Blah...blah @ 06/08/2004 4:55 PM EDT

Matt.. oddly enough, I just purchased The Monster at the end of this Book a few weeks ago at a thrift store.. – what creative genius..

Ghosted by Brian Hammons @ 06/08/2004 5:40 PM EDT

To answer stilewalker’s question: I believe you’re referring to the "Not Quite Human" series, which most will remember as those movies they used to show on the Disney Channel when it was actually good.

Also, I recently found the Dinosaurs TV show on a used tape. That show rocked!
"Not the pajamas! Not the pajamaaas!"

Ghosted by Cheaptrick @ 06/08/2004 5:46 PM EDT

MATT- Awesome as always. Love your articles- you always throw out somthing I was sure only I remembered or cared about!! Nice to see that others too loved that Grover book! Also- DENVER THE LAST DINOSAUR ROCKED!!!!!!!!!!

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 06/08/2004 6:29 PM EDT

the article as always was excelent, though in itself it didn’t move me to post. it was the background of the article that got me. My parents were the types that encouraged me to read everything I could get my hands on, now I’m a geek, thanks mom, anyways, I remember that "golden Books" logo very fondly. and expecially the tugboat right before mickey. That was my favorite story, though I don’t remember the name now.

Ghosted by brandon @ 06/08/2004 6:37 PM EDT

Hey Stilewalker,

Is the movie that was inspired by those books you talked about Not Quite Human?

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093649/

And proof that the movies were based on books.

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0568588/

Ghosted by Teirusu @ 06/08/2004 6:48 PM EDT

Wow, look at Grover’s inner torment.

Ghosted by 47i4i @ 06/08/2004 6:50 PM EDT

The full house book could have been worse…"Dave Coulier’s Full house of activities" comes to mind. OH how about "There’s a Dave Coulier at the end of this book" muahahha Grover beware! Robo Coulier is coming to get you!

Yeah monster at the end was my fav book as a kid too

Ghosted by heeloyd @ 06/08/2004 7:04 PM EDT

….so when i was like 4 and trying to read through the grover book i was really creeped out to see what the hell was at the end of the book ….. sad thing was by the time i re-read it like a few days later I WAS STILL CREEPED OUT…. i was a stupid child ….

Ghosted by Matt (ok not really just Graves in a clever disguise) @ 06/08/2004 7:06 PM EDT

heeloyd

And don’t forget Dave Coulier and Other Monsters…

Katie

Don’t worry, I was thinking the same thing…the first season, DJ and Steph shared a room…then after Michelle grew, DJ got her own room, and so Steph had to share her room with Michelle. Yes, I know, I’m pathetic. :)

Ghosted by The Dragon @ 06/08/2004 8:45 PM EDT

Matt… your best work in a LOOOOOOOOOOOOONG time! I haven’t laughed like that in a while. Thanks.

Ghosted by Kaynyne @ 06/08/2004 9:13 PM EDT

Why, I believe this was my favorite review(s?) ever.

Ghosted by Denise @ 06/08/2004 9:32 PM EDT

Woo, I definitely had that Grover book. Still might in the basement somewhere. Also, I have Denver the Last Dinosaur on tape, from TV. Living in Denver and all, that was… so speshul. ^^; I tried watching it recently, and dear lord but the whiny eighties voices and slang and "look" just killed me…

Ghosted by Amanda Swiftgold @ 06/09/2004 12:16 PM EDT

Hey…has anyone ever heard of the ‘MoonDreamers’? or did I drink acid in my orange juice every saturday after watching my little pony?

Because noone has heard of that show. Or the toys. Am I alone?

Ghosted by Bitsy&Roary @ 06/09/2004 12:19 PM EDT

Yes, I too had the Grover book. Classic shit. If that Full House book is unauthorized it should have included controversial trivia..

1) How much blow does Bob Saget do before each take?

2) How many little boys has Dave Coullier molested on the set?

3) Why do we give a shit about Candace Cameron or Julie Sweetin(sp)?

4) How many gallons of cum has Kimmie Gibbler guzzled in her lifetime?

5) What year do the Olsen Twins become the #1 selling pornstars in Japan for movies that feature goat beastiality?

I don’t know, it just seems to be more unauthorized…boredom is a horrible thing sometimes….

Ghosted by phunqsauce @ 06/09/2004 12:43 PM EDT

I’d still put the Monster At The End Of This Book on my list of greatest books ever written in the history of ink & parchment.

I call dibs on the review of Cookie Monster & the Cookie Tree.

Ghosted by Mike Fireball @ 06/09/2004 12:51 PM EDT

hehe…kimmie gibbler aka cummy guzzler…

Couldn’t resist…-_-;

Ghosted by heeloyd @ 06/09/2004 1:05 AM EDT

Great review!
I actually read that book about once every few weeks. I’m a daycare teacher and my kids go crazy for that book. I had completely forgotten about until one fateful day when one of the kids brought it into class.

My favorite book as a kid? Owley..

Ghosted by hugsnstuff @ 06/09/2004 1:08 AM EDT

yeah, my co-workers think that i am a weirdo too. They walk by and see me reading about full house, its kinda awkward.

Ghosted by zombone @ 06/09/2004 7:23 AM EDT

"I’m the baby gotta love me. Big purple eyes, I’m very cuddley. Don’t you think that everyone should have one of me…OR THREE"

Ghosted by Got Nothin' @ 06/09/2004 8:11 AM EDT

I remember watching Full House when I was younger. I tolerated most of the cast, but I friggin hated Joey. He always pissed me off, wanting to be a comedian, but only doing lame jokes and cartoon voices. The guy was clearly out of touch with comedy acts in the 80’s.

Ghosted by Number5 @ 06/09/2004 8:12 AM EDT

Thank you very much, Cheaptrick & Teirusu. That was it! I REALLY liked those books.

Ghosted by Stilewalker @ 06/09/2004 8:52 AM EDT

Now I am not one to suggest articles, Matt has it WELL under control and I doubt he needs our advice, but I think it would be fun to review the crappy movies (that I thouroughly enjoyed, sadly) starring our favorite barbarian twins: Peter and David Paul. Anybody rememebr these guys?

Ghosted by Stilewalker @ 06/09/2004 8:55 AM EDT

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