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03/05/2004: New Article: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Cookies!

When you happen upon a sealed box of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Cookies from 1989, you shouldn’t keep it to yourself. In today’s article, we open up and examine the doughy legacy, complete with two commercial reviews and an epilogue featuring Rocksteady rhyming. The cookies came in four flavors, and Leonardo really wanted you to eat them. Have a nice weekend. Love being a turtle.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 98 comments

I vaugely remember the how the cookies tasted, but that I liked them. But they could have tasted bad. Like those certain foods that taste like sewage, but you are drawn to anyways. Maybe that’s just me?

Ghosted by Rob @ 03/06/2004 6:35 PM EST


Has anyone seen the commercial for the new Fruit By The Foot? Instead of a piece of red plastic (like the piece that would come with the original Transformer toys), you use the actual Fruit By The Foot to read hidden messages.

Ghosted by She-Man @ 03/06/2004 7:40 PM EST


"Oooh and by the way 28th post…The Lucky One and pygmalien you two are both idiots and desrve to choke on some TMNT cookies"

Yeah, yeah… your jealousy is so transparent. And I’m a dork, not an idiot, but so what… at least now I never have to do it again. Thank God; I really do hate that.

(Of course, I also make it a point not to be insulted by people who can’t even spell correctly, so…)

Ghosted by The Lucky One @ 03/06/2004 7:54 PM EST


I don’t believe it! There WAS a worse costume than Next Mutilation! I remember the cookies (I think they also had the rights to Power Rangers and a couple others) but I don’t remember the ad.

Ghosted by ShadowWing the Technorganic Ninja @ 03/06/2004 7:59 PM EST


I lived in Council Bluffs Iowa for the first 18 years of my life. The Mall of the Bluffs isn’t in Nevraska and the park where they shot the commercial is a park in Omaha called the Heartland of America park. Yay for Council Bluffs!

Ghosted by jazzjunkie @ 03/06/2004 8:12 PM EST


holy crap dude. I WAS AT THE MALL WHEN THEY CAME OUT WITH THESE. I HAVE A PICTURE WITH ME STANDING NEXT TO RAPHAEL.

Ghosted by peteypablo64 @ 03/06/2004 9:08 PM EST


Ick.. I think I’d puke if I had to stand *next to* a ninja turtle.. I mean they’re cool ‘an all but shit!¿

Hey Matt, look what you’ve done now.. Damn Thexder!
MmMmmMmm.. Transformy goodness…..
(shameless plug)

Ghosted by Cyanyde @ 03/06/2004 11:32 PM EST


Good stuff, Matt.

Ghosted by G'Noose @ 03/07/2004 12:14 PM EST


I remember trying this once before I went back to Teddy Grahams. If I am remembering properly, yes they tasted like Teddy Grahams, only crappy second rate Teddy Grahams made by starving orphans that mix their bile and hatred into every batch.

I am exagerating. They tasted like second-rate Teddy Grahams.

PeteyPablo64: It is now your mission in life to get that picture scanned and share it with us here.

Ghosted by Kit @ 03/07/2004 12:49 PM EST


I still have the ninja turtle cookie bank. I am gonna take it to the bank and finally empty out the coins.

Ghosted by Danny @ 03/07/2004 12:51 PM EST


Damn! It was only the Blog archive..
Crap, crap, crap…

Ghosted by Cyanyde @ 03/07/2004 1:22 AM EST


Speaking of the "Shells tour" one poster mentioned, does anyone remember the cassette tape that Pizza Hut was giving away during the tour? I wonder if Matt has it. He must have got the mp3 of "coming out of our shells" somewhere.

Ghosted by Randy @ 03/07/2004 4:27 AM EST


Randy, here you go:
http://www.x-entertainment.com/articles/0746/

Link’s Sword:
http://www.planetgamecube.com/news.cfm?action=item&id=5102

Ghosted by ME @ 03/07/2004 2:30 PM EST


He does have an MP3, check the review of the tour (assuming he hasn’t taken the download down).

My dad talking normal sounds more like Michaelangelo than the guy in that commercial, but that REALLY isn’t saying much.

My Fox Kid’s club dealy was hosted by "Roxy the Fox" (some woman wearing a brightly colored fox mask) I hated her back in the day, but I feel sorry for her now. I hated her brother "Fleezer" (introduced a few years later) even more. Then she disapeared, and many years later: Fox-Man Kevin (just a guy), a backround of pipes, and a complete lack of segments of any kind appeared to represent Fox’s kid-shows around the time of the Power Rangers/TMNT team-up.

Ghosted by RewolfJ @ 03/07/2004 2:41 PM EST


FUN FACT: This commercial was the inspiration for the movie Pleasentville.

Ghosted by Stilewalker @ 03/07/2004 4:18 PM EST


Wait… I remember these cookies (more specifically, I remember eating them on several occasions despite their horrible taste).

BUT- does anyone remember those Turtles cookies that tasted like Oreos? They were covered with green frosting that was molded into the shape of turtle shells, and on the inside they were… well, like one half of an Oreo cookie, minus the cream.

Anyone remember that?

Ghosted by Night_Trekker @ 03/07/2004 6:39 PM EST


I still have and use that big Michaelangelo cookie jar as a coin bank. This is the first I’ve heard of it since.

Ghosted by Pdilly @ 03/07/2004 7:37 PM EST


http://www.people.fas.harvard.edu/~schapira/tmntnet2.mov

Ghosted by Master P @ 03/07/2004 7:53 PM EST


¡Hola señor Matt!

1-¿A Mike who looks like Barney in a pathetic local commercial?
¿Ewoks on fucking ice? this are reasons of why everyone in the world hates USA.
2- FACT- Here in Mexico TMNT was a primetime show at 8pm in competition for the ratings vs the Simpsons. The mexican dubbing has a plenty of local slang, its more fun watch the turtles in spanish than english

Ghosted by Erasmo @ 03/08/2004 2:23 AM EST


Sweet fucking sugar coating. Matt, I think you just busted a block im my head. When these things hit the market, I got hired to do a 2 day job in Connecticut actually BEING one of the turtles (in a really bad Raph suit). I remember having to sit in the super market half the damn morning, while little kids whacked the shit outta my shins, and the older ones just threw crap at me. End of the day, the lady from the cookie company gave me like 15 bucks and told me to scram, not even a free box or anything. I’ll see if I can find some pics of that to email you, I’m sure I have them somewhere.

PS. Raphs (or Mikeys) mask on the column is an easter egg. Monopoly?

Ghosted by Toxikfoxx @ 03/08/2004 9:40 AM EST


I have the Monopoly hand-held slot machine. Loads of fun.

Ghosted by kingklash @ 03/08/2004 2:30 PM EST


Why do you insist on eating things that are at least 5 years old :P

Ghosted by Recoil @ 03/08/2004 4:41 PM EST


I joined the fox 49 kids club and i still have about 20 of the kids club mags and a couple postcards that I got when it was my birthday they had coupons for chuck E cheese’s and stuff like that they were just an advertisement for the shows of course, power rangers, Bobby’s world, Alvin and the chipmunks, sonic the hedgehog etc. I also have a special that the fox 49 guy had (forget his name) that was a kids show about kid’s stuff, he interviewed a producer from the simpsons that is why I recorded it, I love the simpsons ‘drools’

anyway I just thought I would put that out there…

Ghosted by goob @ 03/08/2004 5:19 PM EST


Ah the 80s… How I’m kinda glad I’m done with that–though those turtles were so cool. Hmm though I don’t remember ever eating their cookies..even if I was a kid at the targeted age at the time… I only played the games.

I think I’m glad I didn’t have any.. "artifical chocolate chip"? Did I see that right?

Ghosted by Merit @ 03/08/2004 10:16 PM EST


i actually liked the apple cinnamon ones the best

Ghosted by valarie @ 03/09/2004 12:18 PM EST


natural vanilla sucked

Ghosted by valarie @ 03/09/2004 12:19 PM EST


Wait, when was there a Power Rangers/TMNT team-up?

Ghosted by Icymatt @ 03/09/2004 9:39 AM EST


that made my day. thank you :)

Ghosted by becca @ 03/09/2004 10:26 AM EST


Saban was behind Next Mutation. So it was a foretold, forgone, fortheluvvapete lock for a TMNT/MMPR crossover. Blorgh.

Ghosted by kingklash @ 03/09/2004 1:01 PM EST


Yeah, I too remember the Ninja Turtles Cookies.

They were 3/4 good. Leonardo’s regualar cookies, Raphael’s Cinnamon, Donatello’s Chocolate Chip. The Michealangelo Peanut Butter ones sucked though…not even my dog would eat them.

I also remember the contest where you could fill out a stub at your grocer and win a toy. I won Donatello. Sweet!!!

Ghosted by pvtkeyser @ 03/10/2004 3:37 AM EST


I never ate the cookies, although I had the shitty tasting cereal. Ugh..

Ghosted by Jeremiah @ 03/10/2004 6:18 PM EST


dude, i swear i have that same figure of the rhino in th pants!

Ghosted by flod @ 03/10/2004 9:29 PM EST


That new Ninja Turtles series sucks. So it’s more like the comic… I don’t care! I like the old series. I wish that CN would start showing it.

Ghosted by AngeFaitore @ 03/11/2004 5:15 PM EST


Hey Matt, you oughta do a review on the TMNT snack that was known as Crunchabungas. They were pizza/cracker-like snacks. The other cool thing about them was that they had this cool claymated commercial featuring no one but the TMNT themselves. But I guess you can only write a review on it if you’re able to obtain the appropriate resources (e.g. the commercial, the snack itself, etc.)

Ghosted by Nate @ 03/20/2004 7:40 AM EST


Nate: I know about those, and would love to, but can’t just yet for reasons described in your last sentence. :)

Ghosted by Matt @ 03/20/2004 2:25 PM EST


Matt: Yeah, totally understandable.

Ghosted by Nate @ 03/22/2004 6:55 PM EST


Matt: Yeah, totally understandable.

Ghosted by Nate @ 03/22/2004 6:55 PM EST


heh.. my brother still has one of the coin bank Turtles. i threw mine away a few years ago.

it was Hell to eat them even back when they were fresh, but you HAD to if you wanted the coin bank…

Ghosted by Sara @ 03/28/2004 4:35 AM EST


WHat was that thing on the corner of the box insisting that we watch them "come to life"? Is it milk? Are you supposed to drop them in your milk and watch them bloat up to life with milk blood?

Ghosted by mugatu_monster @ 04/15/2004 6:29 AM EDT


Okay, I’m sorry that this has nothing to do with TMNT< but it has something to do with gone cookies; does anyone remember those chocolate chip cookie sticks called "Spit spot" I believe (like what Mary Poppins always said)? Mmm, tasty...and by the way, I have, on tape, the original TMNT cartoons- surprisingly homoerotic. Oh I'm sorry, I've brought sexuality into the classroom.

Oh well.

Ghosted by Josh @ 04/15/2004 8:08 PM EDT


Okay, I’m sorry that this has nothing to do with TMNT< but it has something to do with gone cookies; does anyone remember those chocolate chip cookie sticks called "Spit spot" I believe (like what Mary Poppins always said)? Mmm, tasty...and by the way, I have, on tape, the original TMNT cartoons- surprisingly homoerotic. Oh I'm sorry, I've brought sexuality into the classroom.

Oh well.

Ghosted by Josh @ 04/15/2004 8:08 PM EDT


Okay, I’m sorry that this has nothing to do with TMNT< but it has something to do with gone cookies; does anyone remember those chocolate chip cookie sticks called "Spit spot" I believe (like what Mary Poppins always said)? Mmm, tasty...and by the way, I have, on tape, the original TMNT cartoons- surprisingly homoerotic. Oh I'm sorry, I've brought sexuality into the classroom.

Oh well.

Ghosted by Josh @ 04/15/2004 8:08 PM EDT


They are all sooooo sexy!

Ghosted by Blastoffamyblahdramyass @ 05/04/2004 1:08 PM EDT


lmfao ur halarious

Ghosted by TaTe @ 05/24/2004 9:49 AM EDT


hey i wish i knew where i could get a hold of these cute cookies!!

Ghosted by Pearl @ 05/25/2004 5:53 PM EDT


hey i wish i knew where i could get a hold of these cute cookies!!

Ghosted by Pearl @ 05/25/2004 5:53 PM EDT


hey i wish i knew where i could get a hold of these cute cookies!!

Ghosted by timothyoneseven @ 05/25/2004 5:54 PM EDT


I was a huge Ninja Turtles fan when I was younger and watched them every day on KPTM, so imagine my glee when I won the Fox 42 Kids Club sweepstakes! Sure my prize was just another crappy Leonardo that I already had, but I WON it! I was the king of the 5th grade for like 2 weeks with that baby!

Ghosted by Viperlord @ 03/05/2010 10:25 PM EST


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