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The Masters of the Universe Coloring Book.

Looking at the main page, I noticed that I hadn't done a He-Man article in many months. Whoops. Making up for some lost time, here's my review of an insane Masters of the Universe Coloring Book, featuring two stories and some strange games and puzzles. The stories contain everything from Skeletor driving clouds to forcing marriage on Teela, so it seemed like something I had to show you. Review spans several pages, but it's mostly a quick read, so get readin' quick.

Posted by Matt on 03/03/2004. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 124 comments

Funny, I remember the last page to be something more like http://www.manningave.com/images/mar04/cheney.gif">this…

Chestnuts roasted by Seth @ 03/04/2004 6:10 PM

God, I haven’t been to the aquarium since it opened. But if you need anywhere close to park or bar suggestions next time you go, let me know. I’ve got connections.

Okay, okay, pretty lousy types of connections to have, but I have them. Beats not paying covers for some of the boardwalk bars, though.

Chestnuts roasted by Lackadaisical @ 03/04/2004 6:18 PM

whoa..I used to read those..scary stuff. I even had one that came with an audio tape…good times. haha

Chestnuts roasted by Sophia @ 03/04/2004 8:44 PM

I say that Teela and He-Man saw a McDonalds, there’s one of those everywhere.

Chestnuts roasted by Laurel @ 03/04/2004 8:51 PM

I think He-Man and Teela see Matt, their god, who has ressurected them from the lonely hell of the thrift shop, or wherever he got them from.

Chestnuts roasted by Gabbylicious @ 03/04/2004 11:59 PM

I used to have a Real Ghosters coloring book (actually its probably still around the house somewhere) anyone else have one of those?

Chestnuts roasted by Lossenelin @ 03/05/2004 12:43 PM

I was just wondering if it were at all possible to sanction a "Coloring Contest" for that one page from the coloring book where you basically draw what you think He-man and Teela are looking at.

Chestnuts roasted by King Ghidorah @ 03/05/2004 7:35 AM

I think the droopy sleepy eyes for skeletor are weird enough.

Chestnuts roasted by Catherine @ 03/05/2004 11:04 AM

Interesting article. I think the MOTU motion picture was a better story than this coloring book.

Chestnuts roasted by The Dragonrider @ 03/05/2004 12:15 PM

I had no idea they made coloring books… guess there’s no end to the possibilities when it comes to merchandise

Chestnuts roasted by Recoil @ 03/05/2004 12:56 PM

Hey Matt,

Love the website, check it out everyday to see what new thing you might have brought up from the 80′s basement that day…I was wondering, have you ever seen the "He-Man" T.V. tray? I found one at a garage sale years ago, and have it hanging on my bedroom wall. Still in good shape and waiting to go on ebay one day…just wondering if you had seen one before in your travels…Love the site and will check you out again later!

Chestnuts roasted by superflash68 @ 03/05/2004 1:15 PM

I had one as a child — sort of orange/yellow?

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 03/05/2004 1:19 PM

No, metal with 2 metal legs that fold up from underneath on the bottom and the top has a battle going on with He-man slapping Skel around, Tella taking on a HUGE Beast-man and Man-At-Arms swinging something around. The ground in the picture looks like a wartorn battlefield, Castle Greyskull is in the background, on the horizon you can see an army of somethings making there way towards the viewer and there is something like Stratos flying in the air, but you can’t tell who is is (forced persective type-ofthin). It has a little rust on it, but is still in great shape and just cool to look at. And I think,(I’m at work and can’t see it right now) it has a Batman style "BAM" floating in the air by He-man and Skel…real neat! If I can I’ll try to take a picture of it and send it to your site. And I think it is from the beginning of the MOTU line because Man-At-Arms doesn’t have that Village People mustache that they laid on him from the cartoon.

Chestnuts roasted by superflash68 @ 03/05/2004 1:39 PM

Haven’t been in the actual PP aquarium in years, but it’s pretty much the only beach my family goes to. Yah, parking definitely sucks; usually Dad just drops us off with all the stuff, then goes searching on his own so we don’t all have to make the trek. Nice guy.

Anyway, love that beach. (Though I’ve never actually heard it called Point Pleasant BEACH… it’s just Point Pleasant to us.) Yep, plenty of bars, although I’ve never been the same since they got rid of that one show they used to have in one of the restaurants. You know, the one with the talking tree and the gorilla? Woody and somebody? God, how many years ago was that, anyway? I’m old. After that, the only thing I could really get excited about was that live-action, interactive video game in Martell’s, Mad Dog McCree or whatever it was.

Chestnuts roasted by The Lucky One @ 03/05/2004 2:44 PM

Matt, I was daydreaming in school when it hit me. There’s a movie that’s right up your reviewing alley, though it might be excrutiating to watch-I mean in the Nukie way, not the Critters way.

THEODORE REX.

Chestnuts roasted by Behonkiss @ 03/05/2004 2:46 PM

"Nice shootin.’ Try another one."

You know, I don’t think I ever played that game. Seems like most arcades got rid of it as soon as it ceased being hot, so during the times I saw it, it always had a crowd. I was too shy to press my luck. Still, I don’t think there’s a single game I ever stood in front of to watch others play it more, including any of the SF or MK games.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 03/05/2004 2:56 PM

Arcades scared the shit out of me…especially Wizard’s castle. I was always facinated by "The Wizard’s Rules" list posted nearby the entrance. But there was no wizard…there was just a fat 20-something man sitting in the corner peddlin’ quarters.

Chestnuts roasted by Kristal @ 03/05/2004 3:06 PM

I think I only played it once, and as I recall I was pretty shit at it. There was nary a "Nice shootin’, try another one!" spoken aloud that day, my friends. Damn game still remains one of my fondest memories of childhood, though, because I think the chick who played the mayor’s daughter was the first "older woman" I was ever sexually attracted to. God, she was hot. In my memory, anyway. I used to just stand in front of the game, cursing at the old fart to stop explaining how to shoot bottles so she could come out and talk about her daddy again. Mmmmmmm… not really the ideal time for me to be wearing a bathing suit.

Chestnuts roasted by The Lucky One @ 03/05/2004 3:32 PM

A few things:

1: I’ve been reading X-E for quite a while now, and can safely say this is one of the funniest articles to date. Dunno why, but kudos to Matt.

2: One the second page of the "Bridal Path" bit, on the scan where Teela is ripping off her veil, what the heck is that thing on the lower-left-hand corner of her dress, and why is it spewing flowers and potpourri?

And 3: This… thing…
http://www.gfxbank.com/is.php?i=6496&img=heman.jpg
Well.. I tried…

Chestnuts roasted by Uncle Scrotor @ 03/05/2004 7:53 PM

Holy crap, i’d forgotten i’d owned that monster book. God, the years of psycho-therapy and thousands of dollars down the drain, all thanks to you Matt!!!! Damn you, DAMN YOU!!!!

Chestnuts roasted by Demonmonkey @ 03/05/2004 10:49 PM

As far as Skeletor finding a new line of work…

http://www.geocities.com/alasdairgillis/skelechapel.gif

Chestnuts roasted by Number Six @ 03/06/2004 2:25 AM

Whoa!!, i had a lotta fun watching ur review on that He-man coloring book,in fact,i had the same fun watching it now parodied (as a grown up), as i did coloring it when i was 10 years old, good ole fun revisited!
PD. regarding skeletor’s dick! i guess he was the one that switched the word "erection" to "boner", and , "sexual frustration" with "blue balls"

Chestnuts roasted by rigormortis!!! @ 03/06/2004 2:50 AM

Has anyone seen the commercial for the new Fruit By The Foot? Instead of a piece of red plastic (like the piece that would come with the original Transformer toys), you use the actual Fruit By The Foot to read hidden messages.

Chestnuts roasted by She-Man @ 03/06/2004 8:16 AM

Man. I thought I had He-Man face some strange stuff .

Chestnuts roasted by The Dragonrider @ 03/06/2004 2:51 PM

King Ghidorah, when we see the Photog entries, then I think it will be safe to request new coloring contests. We’ve got enough constantly repeated comments with the "First Post", "Post the Photog pics" and "Review Mac and Me" already without opening a new can of worms.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 03/06/2004 3:10 PM

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 3rd, 2004 at 3:11 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.