X-Entertainment | The Masters of the Universe Coloring Book.

The Masters of the Universe Coloring Book.

Looking at the main page, I noticed that I hadn't done a He-Man article in many months. Whoops. Making up for some lost time, here's my review of an insane Masters of the Universe Coloring Book, featuring two stories and some strange games and puzzles. The stories contain everything from Skeletor driving clouds to forcing marriage on Teela, so it seemed like something I had to show you. Review spans several pages, but it's mostly a quick read, so get readin' quick.

Posted by Matt on 03/03/2004. E-mail me!

Discussion Thread: 124 comments

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So lemme get this straight….the ultimate holy grail of skeletor…the SECRETS of castle greyskull was that it had a tv?

Skel wasted every ep of the cartoon just trying to watch tv and when he did, that killjoy, he-man broke the reception.

Poor skel.

Chestnuts roasted by vyle @ 03/03/2004 7:31 PM

I want an Attak Trak. At least the colouring book promoted literacy, even if the commercials didn’t…

Chestnuts roasted by Gabbylicious @ 03/03/2004 7:33 PM

Matt, the Supersize needs an article before it is gone forever.

Would you like to ‘Supersize’ that? Too bad — you can’t
http://www.suntimes.com/output/news/cst-nws-super03.html

Chestnuts roasted by ME @ 03/03/2004 7:37 PM

These coloring books could not have been written by the same authors of the little booklets that came with the original he man action figures. They were much more creative. Any chance of getting a hold of one of them matt?

Chestnuts roasted by mike b @ 03/03/2004 7:43 PM

Not to disparage the color commentary, but the greatest thing about the article was that little psycho’s coloring choices. I can’t even begin to imagine the mental deficiencies he was coping with.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 03/03/2004 7:48 PM

One giant coloring/activity book I remember having was one for Defenders of the Earth,the eighties cartoon/toyline featuring the King Features Syndicate action/adventure comic strip characters (Flash Gordon,The Phantom,Mandrake the Magican) and their battles against Ming the Merciless. The only real thing I remember fromt he book itself was a maze where you had to help The Phantom get back to his Skull Cave in the African jungle.

Chestnuts roasted by Overlord @ 03/03/2004 8:33 PM

Matt, was the baseball player all 6’10 of
Randy Johnson?
http://www.spawntoys.com/Baseball/mlb1_johnson.jpg
http://www.ardmoreite.com/images/111699/johnson.jpg
http://www.colosscollect.com/mags/si/si011105.jpg

Chestnuts roasted by She-Man @ 03/03/2004 8:59 PM

"Draw what you think TEELA and HE-MAN see."

*cough* Photog *cough*

This was brilliant. Great commentary, Matt.

Chestnuts roasted by Rainbowfeet @ 03/03/2004 9:29 PM

I copied one of the pages and well, I used the paint program to color a great picture of Skeletor It was pretty cool. But a complete waste of time. Still I have something to do at work tommorrow if they have no work to give me.

Chestnuts roasted by Rowan Steele @ 03/03/2004 9:30 PM

on top of it already rainbowfeet:

http://phocusmusic.com/teela.jpg

Chestnuts roasted by chad @ 03/03/2004 9:32 PM

I wonder if these were closer to the *first* MOTU minicomics. This is something I never knew about until I read them at He-Man.org. They were more like illustrated booklets than comics. (Kind of like the Princess of Power minis where Catra was the only villain, whose evil plots involved stealing jewelry and stealing She-Ra’s boyfriend.)

The plot of these 3 or 4 are wierd: He-Man is just some cave bumkin who leaves his village to battle evil. He ends up saving the Sorcerous (which I know is the wrong spelling, but my Franklin Spelling Ace declares is an acutal word–maybe I want Sorceress?), sometimes called the Goddess–anyway it’s just the snake armor version of Teela. She gives him the Battle Ram and two different harnesses–one giving him super strength and one that projects a force field. (They both looked like the same harness to me, but what the hey.) This would explain the scene where Mer-Man is disrobing him. And you thought he was just a perv.

There’s no royal palace that I can see. (That would come in the second timeline, just before the toon-like third one. Three continuities in one minicomic toyline. Geez!) Stratos and Man-At-Arms are both hermits who have a shaky friendship with He-Man, who lives in a cave. The Power Sword has been split in half because it’s the key to Castle Greyskull.

Teela is just a clone of the Sorceress/Godess that Skeletor once tried to use to take over the Castle, but turned on her so she joins the Heroic Warriors. This is also where the "Spirit of the Castle" comes from.

And yes, these stories are just as odd as the ones in the coloring book. Head to He-Man.org, and look in the comic section.
http://www.he-man.org/primary_sects/comics/html/index.shtml

You’ll want "He-Man & the Power Sword", "King of Castle Greyskull" (which was later used as a View Master 3-reel set–I still have it packed away somewhere), "Battle in the Clouds", "The Vengeance of Skeletor", "The Tale of Teela" (which is actually a comic in the DC arcs, but it’s an odd story anyway so just read it, darn you!), and then just look around. It’s all up there and readable.

Hey, how often do *I* get to act like a know it all and be right?

Chestnuts roasted by ShadowWing the Technorganic Autobot @ 03/03/2004 9:57 PM

Wow. Just when I was wondering if the 80′s revival was going to wipe out true nostalgia of the era, I see a review of some old merchandise that barely made sense when it first came out, much less now. You can really weed out the poseurs from those who were consumed by MOTU as a kid when you whip out this shit.

A friend of mine actually had this book back in the day– I remember the sea monster’s head on the cover being far more disturbing than it had any right to be. Seriously, it’s like some lost soul got sent to hell and then turned all scaly and long-necked. Far too human of a monster to easily forget.

As for what He-man and Teela saw… I’m torn between Photog and badger badger badger.

Bitner Bitner Bitner Bitner Bitner…

Chestnuts roasted by Alt-Tab @ 03/03/2004 9:58 PM

Sorry for the double post after the way too long response but I forgot to add "Click on "Masters of the Universe". I was going to edit in the preview, but when I went back the whole form was blank I didn’t want to retype all that for one sentence. Can you blame me?

Chestnuts roasted by ShadowWing the blablabla @ 03/03/2004 9:59 PM

Hilarious Article. I had that same coloring book. Boy, that brings back memories.

Chestnuts roasted by Troy @ 03/03/2004 10:05 PM

funny shit once again

Chestnuts roasted by Scourge @ 03/03/2004 10:09 PM

Mine sucks, but I’ll post it anyway.

http://mywebpage.netscape.com/NoEarlOn/4.gif

Chestnuts roasted by Teirusu @ 03/03/2004 10:15 PM

Note about mine: Wait a couple of seconds, it’s animated (Sorta).

Chestnuts roasted by Teirusu @ 03/03/2004 10:16 PM

Hey She-Man, just wanted to say that Matt said "basketball" player, so it wasnt the Big Unit.

Well known? New Jersey? I’ll go with Jason Kidd (6’4", taller than the avg. person) or 6’9" Kenyon Martin.

Hope this helps (if anyone else cares).
http://www.nba.com/playerfile/jason_kidd/index.html?nav=page
http://www.nba.com/playerfile/kenyon_martin/index.html?nav=page

Chestnuts roasted by Mizzat @ 03/03/2004 11:12 PM

Point Pleasant? As a previous resident of the town, I just have to point out that, if you were at the boardwalk, it’s Point Pleasant ‘Beach’. And yes, there is a difference. I never met a basketball player there, though. Kathy Ireland, on the other hand…

Picky-ness aside, your captions to this book were hilarious. Thanks for all the great stories and (sometimes embarrassing) memories!

Chestnuts roasted by Lackadaisical @ 03/04/2004 12:06 PM

Point Pleasant Beach it is, then. My friends and I actually go there quite a bit during the summer. The boardwalk can’t compare in sheer seedy joy to the almighty Wildwood, but it’s a Hell of a lot closer to where we live and there’s lots of bars. Plus, I love that stupid little aquarium. And the fact that the parking lots sometimes become full, necessitating street parking roughly 18 miles away from said boardwalk.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 03/04/2004 12:09 PM

Awesome stuff as usual. Good to see a new He-man update, and one of the highest quality at that.

Chestnuts roasted by Rood @ 03/04/2004 12:19 PM

Yay Chad!!

Chestnuts roasted by Rainbowfeet @ 03/04/2004 12:28 PM

well this is actually what they and what i should only hope to see.

http://americanruserecords.com/Jared/theythink.jpg">teela and He-Man

Chestnuts roasted by CheyenneWay @ 03/04/2004 12:34 PM

im so tired i cant remeberm what i was going to tyope……..disneyland trip tommorrow… ^_^ >:O

Chestnuts roasted by heeloyd @ 03/04/2004 2:41 AM

It’s all pretty funny, but… for some reason… that last page had me laughing at an impudent volume for such an early hour. Especially "The Square Who Acted Like an Oval" and Skeletor’s eyes reading "cut out", like he’s possessed by the spirit of Dave Coulier as "Uncle Joey", except that the exact quote is "Come on, come on, cut it out!", but I’ll just pretend that Skeletor’s eyes are giving you the gist of what Spirit Uncle Joey is thinking.

Anyhow, damn, I can’t find a picture and don’t want to go through my brother’s "archives" under the stairs this evening, but, if someone has this, please, please draw in the "Alphabet Pet" from the early 1980s X-Men Coloring Book and add a sign saying "Alphabet Pet: PROPERTY OF MAGNETO!" for the ultimate colouring book crossover!

Chestnuts roasted by Steve Brandon @ 03/04/2004 3:26 AM

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