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01/07/2004: New Article: The Amazing Bag O’ Crap!

Well, this one is different. The latest article reviews one of my recent finds, the infamous Bag O’ Crap. Found at a thrift store a few weeks back, it’s a giant Ziploc bag filled to the top with cereal premiums, toys, candies, and other novelties from the 70s and 80s. A lot of the stuff was cool enough to be worth mentioning, but still too small for their own reviews. This article lumps it all together — 49 different mini-reviews and pics, all trapped in one giant picture. You’ll see what I mean, enjoy! I will never try this again! Enjoy! The next article hopes you’re hungry.

Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

Discussion Thread: 146 comments

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Let’s see, I remember having not one, but three of those Batman candy heads, just mine had no coloring to their eyes at all. And I remember buying Fizz Whiz when I was little at a penny candy shop when I was in first grade. That stuff kicked the everloving crap out of Pop Rocks. I never knew it was Austrailian. Hell, I never even heard of Austrialia until I was in 3rd grade. I thought that Philadelphia (my home) and New Jersey were as big as half the planet. Remember being a foolish kid?

I remember the Galaxy Rangers Roy Rogers’ kids meals. Hell, I fondly remember everything Roy Rogers, because they were my favorite fast food chain of my childhood. I even met Roy Rogers at a grand opening one of their restaraunts. My dad tells me that Roy said to me "I bet you don’t know who I am", to which I responded, "You’re Bronco Billy", that being a Clint Eastwood film from the late ’70’s. Roy’s burgers ruled… the Fixins was the schiznit, nothing’s better than putting 50 pickle slices on your burger when you’re like 7 years old. However, the only Galaxy Rangers toy I recall was one where the meal was placed in this big plastic spaceship which was to double as a toy boat. It was also adorned with stickers featuring images of the characters from the cartoon. Mostly the bad guys I recall. But I remember the leader had some kinda superhumanly strong arms and there was another good guy was named "Goose."

Yeah, I’d love to see that and Bionic 6 and all those crappy cartoons I liked on DVD now.

Anywho, I wanted to throw in that you CAN find Superfriends on DVD, so why not any of the other lame crap?

Ghosted by Joe D. @ 01/08/2004 2:24 AM EST

Now those, those are some sexy old toys.

The "the Mummy" and "Nicker" keychains, or at least the graphics on them, go at least back to the early 1970s–you know those gumball machines where you put a quarter in and you get some random toy or little trinket? I had at least three of those monster-heads like those two, only in glow-in-the-dark, puffy sticker form, out of a machine like that at the supermarket where my Mom used to shop. A major carbon-dating clue was, there was one that was a vampire face that said "Barnabas" (of that godawful vampire drama "Dark Shadows" fame). This was after the show had gone off the air, but before cable TV had appeared, so I was like, "’Barnabas’? What the hell??"

And to double/triple/however many times we’re up to confirm: yes, that’s a Capt. Crunch flying disk, and the little thing with it is a launcher—you sort of hold the launcer between your thumb & forefinger, put it into the notch on the disk, and sort of pull back n’ release. In the "free! in specially marked boxes of…" ad, they showed some kids using ‘em.

Ghosted by Jon @ 01/08/2004 4:46 AM EST

Duck, you mean you don’t have feathers? You poor bald fowl you.

Ghosted by Gabbylicious @ 01/08/2004 4:57 AM EST

"Yes, the Garfield pencil toppers! I think there was also an Odie one, and, believe it or not, it was his TONGUE you wagged to make him blink. But then again, I may be smoking crack. "

Nope, I had both the Odie and Garfield. There was also a Nermal and Garfield’s kitty friend. Came in Corn Pop cereal. Garfield was abundent, bought four boxes of corn pops and got three Garfields and one Odie.

Ghosted by Thomas @ 01/08/2004 5:32 AM EST

Oddly enough, it was 5:30 in the morning, and since I didn’t feel like going back to sleep, I decided to sit here and read all 49 articles to this. Meanwhile, I was watching "Garfield and Friends," and then came across that pencil topper thing. I thought for sure that garfield had a different look in 1981 than he does now, to the point where if it was a 1981 edition, I wouldn’t have recognized it right away. But then after finding the Garfield cartoon on my computer from the day I was born (11/13/81), I realized that everybody’s favorite feline hasn’t really changed all that much in the past 22 years. I’m done babbling now. Keep up the good work with the site Matt!

Ghosted by Skitzo @ 01/08/2004 6:27 AM EST

On that lunatic test i got ludwig II.

I’m glad alot of other people fondly remember those reflectors, they were one of the nicer things you’d get for free out of a box of cereal.

I remember going crazy as a little kid to get all those mini basebal and also football helmets. Even though i didn’t really like football i liked the helmets better because they came with stickers to put on the helmet plus a face guard you could deattacht.

Ghosted by Bright Noah @ 01/08/2004 10:04 AM EST

In response to Skitzo, I always took pride in Garfield because the strip was "born" the same year I was, just two months before me. Back in the late 70s, he was MUCH fatter than he is now. very odd…, he actually slimmed down eating lasagna… move over, Atkins.

Check out this website…it has the first strips.
http://www.tepatoken.com/html/comic/momgarfield.htm

Ghosted by Nachokhaki @ 01/08/2004 10:21 AM EST

Leave it to Matt to bring back my fond childhood memories. I am new to your site, but I am now a daily reader. These blogs are fun!
I remember having about 25% of that crap as a child. Of course I loved the flipper fliers, and I still have Chewy’s head hiding somewhere. I must have collected about 50 of those baseball cap things. They used to be all over the shelves in my room. As for the chicklets, I used to get those for Halloween. That’s the packaging for dispersal. Ahh, memories.

Ghosted by Stilewalker @ 01/08/2004 10:51 AM EST

Guacamole!! I came up Caligula! I suppose, though, I should answer these thing a little more straightlaced or somesuch. Cool, the Duck is Mad King Ludwig, builder of my favorite castle. Location, location, location.

Ghosted by kingklash @ 01/08/2004 11:40 AM EST

Great article Matt. I also had a lot fo the stuff you found, and if I ever move all my stuff out of my parents I’ll probably find some of it again.

Also, with all of this talk about Garfield, who has seen the new Garfield movie trailer. I can’t believe they’re making a live action movie about him!

Ghosted by Beerstalker @ 01/08/2004 11:53 AM EST

Congrats, King! You’re not only insane, you’re also evil! You’re a multi-purpose lunatic.

Ghosted by Gabbylicious @ 01/08/2004 12:49 PM EST

Gabbs, contrary to popular notions, I am not actually a real duck…but I play one on tv. Harder to learn to play a duck than to play violin…It’s odd but last night I didn’t even see the odd connection between ducks and swans. Very odd indeed. Now time to waddle over to thge newest blog entry. I kind of hate that because I am afraid I will miss something. Sad and sort of pathetic, I guess.

Ghosted by Killer Duck @ 01/08/2004 1:34 PM EST

I slice, I dice, I took advantage of an amazing RonCo offer! And I owe it all to my near-genius IQ and teaching myself to read at age three so I could figger oot what Spiderman was saying on Electric Company. "Hello, my name is KingKlash, and I’m addicted to TeleVision. What’s on?"

Ghosted by kingklash @ 01/08/2004 1:36 PM EST

Nice article.

Well JON beat me to it, but like he said, that mummy keychain was also part of a puffy stickers series that would glow in the dark. Never thought I’d see those again, but it’s an amazing flashback. There was also a werewolf, a vampire and some female figure in those stickers..

Must…find…those…stickers…again.

Ghosted by Gralo @ 01/08/2004 2:43 PM EST

Is it just me? Or does that blue toy that you blow into to keep the ball in the air look an awfully lot like a damn crackpipe.

Ghosted by Lemonjello @ 01/08/2004 4:08 PM EST

on that captain crunch thing i know how it works.it is a disk flinger.

Stick peg into notch on the disk. hold the stick part and pull gently back on disk. Release disk and watch it fly..

Ghosted by Rattrap007 @ 01/08/2004 4:19 PM EST

I think that little dinosaur with the mohok was something i had when i was little. Dunk it in water and see if it changes color, if so then yeah, thats the stupid little toy, Ps they made about 30 of those things, i had a purple stegasaurus too..

Ghosted by Marissa @ 01/08/2004 5:10 PM EST

Beerstalker I saw that garfield movie trailer today. Being all cgi is bad enough, but they didn’t even use the same voice actor as the cartoon version. it is a shame cause a cartoon garfield movie with the proper voice actor would have been great.

Ghosted by Bright Noah @ 01/08/2004 5:51 PM EST

Bright Noah, the person that did Garfield’s voice on the cartoon was Lorenzo Music. Yes, his last name was music. He also used to do the voice of Carlton the Doorman on Rhoda (which was a spin off of Mary Tyler Moore). I am pretty sure the reason why he didn’t do the voice for the movie is because he is dead.

Ghosted by Killer Duck @ 01/08/2004 5:57 PM EST

lol, i had the feeling that after i’d complain about the voice actor being different that some one would point out that he was dead and then i’d look like an ass.

Ghosted by Bright Noah @ 01/08/2004 6:16 PM EST

Talk about great stuff! Anyhow, regarding the Garfield stuff. I am certain that they were re-released (as several people have confirmed). I can also confirm the existance of the Odie item, as well as bring to light ANOTHER Garfield, this time he was the propper color (orange, but no stripes), and instead of opening his mouth manipulating the tail would cause him to raise his eyebrows.

Ghosted by Red October @ 01/08/2004 9:31 PM EST

Bright Noah- I don’t think you look like an ass. I agree that it is difficult when you associate one voice with a character and them are expected to believe another voice. I can tell the difference with the Looney Tunes when it isn’t Mel Blanc, I can tell the different voices in the Peanuts ‘toons too.

Ghosted by Killer Duck @ 01/08/2004 9:53 PM EST

These are great. Funny how almost everybody on here had at least one of those things (especially 80s kids, we all pretty much had the same shit).

Those baseball caps were huge as noted above. I have that batman head sitting in a bag of action figures that consists of X-Men, Batman, Ghostbusters & Toxic Crusaders (among others). I always thought it had a strange scale.. guess I know now.

Ghosted by Matt (#2?) @ 01/08/2004 9:58 PM EST

Why is everybody going so apeshit over the so-called "50th item"? As Brentantation (great name btw) said, there were more than 50 items, matt picked what he wanted to do.
Besides, while 49 is only 1 away from 50, it’s also only one away from 48. also, 7×7 is 49. I don’t know much about football, but joe montana played for the 49ers. There’s a town in Montana called "Joe". in 1949 Siam changed it’s name to Thailand. Andy Kaufman was born in ‘49. Shit, i’d say all around 49 is a fuck of a lot cooler than 50 could ever be.

I worry about matt. he works so hard. please don’t ever burn out matt.

Ghosted by Chopstick Sensei @ 01/08/2004 10:59 PM EST

is item #41 the gobbledy gooker from the early 90’s WWF?? Also maybe it is one of jesus’s deciples or my grandma.

Ghosted by aaron @ 01/09/2004 12:22 PM EST

The Burger King "Aladdin" toy that you have no clue about was a "Magic 8 Ball" for the poor kids. What you did was stick the stickers on the smooth side of the spinner, giver ‘er a twirl while you ask the Genie your question, and with the warmth of your hand or breath or whatever is handy, his lamp will reveal the answer to your question much like the "Magic 8 Ball." Provided many answers to the questions of the universe concerning a 5th or 6th grade kid (such as, "Does he like me?" and "Will I pass this stupid test I can’t study for cuz I’m playing with this toy?"). Yeah, great fun, fond memories. Ah, how I miss my fortune telling Genie.
I hope that helps, Matt! Thanks for letting us explore your bag o’ crap with you!

Ghosted by Alycia @ 01/09/2004 12:27 PM EST

How many more people are going to say that’s the Fortune Top? The Top was a cereal giveaway, not a Burger King giveaway. I think it was in Golden Crisp, or Honey Comb or whatever. I have the ad itself on tape to prove this. It’s on a Garfield and Friends tape, to bring the subject back to Garfield. ^_^

Ghosted by Mars @ 01/09/2004 2:54 AM EST

I am no longer able to chew Big Red Gum. I chewed it so much as a kid that I developed an allergy. If I try to chew it now the inside of cheeks swell up so much that it’s difficult to close my mouth. It sucks, because I REALLY REALLY like Big Red Gum. It took me a while to realize that it was the gum that was doing it, too. Kinda sad on my part. Kinda sad that I thought I needed to share that.

Ghosted by KodaK @ 01/09/2004 12:23 PM EST

wow , i remember at least half of whats there
its incredible man ,
kudos on the article matt

Ghosted by Xhay @ 01/09/2004 2:27 PM EST

Matt, absolutely fabulous bag ‘o crap you got there! I remember having some of that junk. Loved reliving it

Ghosted by Dana @ 01/09/2004 3:56 PM EST

Wow. That "Who’s the real Capt. Crunch" contest brings back many memories. I won a Game Boy from that contest. Thing is, I didn’t even know I won until one night when I found a package in front of my back door of my house. I wonder how long it had sat there for…

Dean

Ghosted by Dean @ 01/10/2004 12:25 PM EST

Is the blue thing the Chik-Fil-A chicken?

Ghosted by TEd @ 01/10/2004 2:51 PM EST

About the Chiclets, there aren’t a "multitude of languages" on there as Matt said. Just one language: Spanish. So the Chiclets probably came from Mexico, meaning they’re not as old as they look. A lot of fairly new Mexican packagings look straight out of the 50s; it’s weird.
Anyway, the boxes pictured just say Chiclets Chewing Gum. One is Tutti Frutti flavored. The other one I’m not sure but it looks like the pack says "Sabor Yerbabuena."

If that’s the case, Congratulations Matt, you now own a pack of Mexican Marijuana flavored Chiclets. Hold your head high and be proud.

Ghosted by Nate @ 01/10/2004 6:12 PM EST

Where can I get some Marijuana flavored Chiclets?

Ghosted by OtherMatt @ 01/11/2004 3:51 AM EST

I’m probably to late for anyone to read this, but yes crowbar, I remember the candy spachship containers of powdery death that connected together. Purple, red, blue and such. Wierd spaceshipy designs with "male" and "female" parts to plop them together and a black screw on cap. They also had fruit shaped ones that didn’t connect. The plastic chewed really well. My favorite was the one that seemed like a typical saucer, but it only had like two points of conectiness.

Ghosted by spooky @ 01/13/2004 4:26 AM EST

You dated the article 2003.

Ghosted by Incorrrect year observer @ 01/16/2004 12:31 PM EST

The other one I’m not sure but it looks like the pack says "Sabor Yerbabuena."

Minty flavor.

I still have that Capt’n Crunch spinner laying under the corner of my bed. Yeah, I guess I should clean under there…

I also used to have the plastic Batmobile, but I have no idea where it went

Ghosted by marril159 @ 01/20/2004 10:11 PM EST

The mystery bird/turtle thing is an inexpensive Japanese charm which you can find at Asian curio shops, grocers, malls, etc. You can find them pretty easily where I live (Hawaii). The two large kanji in black read "choju" ("long life"), and it’s not actually a swan but a crane. Both cranes and turtles are Japanese symbols of longevity. Now you know, and knowing is half the battle!

Ghosted by Just A Lurker @ 01/25/2004 11:56 PM EST

I used to have a gazillion of those Krispie poppers. How I loved them- I distinctly remember playing with them for hours (although I would much rather not remember). I also had the Krispie’s Truck. And I love Matt- who but he would actually buy AND write about a bag of crap?

Ghosted by Ryah @ 01/26/2004 10:47 PM EST

Killer Duck is right; the playing cards with the General Mills characters on ‘em came from a promotional deck with Old Maid rules. My grandma had the deck in that ubiquitous Games Closet that all good grandparents would keep for their grandkids when they came over to visit.

There was another deck with numbers on the cards, too, so you could play Crazy Eights.

Ghosted by Spatch @ 01/27/2004 3:31 AM EST

Matt, great article. I wonder how some people have so much luck in finding treasures like your bag o’ crap. In regards to the Chiclets, those are the packages that the homeless street waifs in Mexico try to sell you as they besiege your car right before you cross the border. The package translations are: Goma De Mascar=Chewing Gum, Sabor Yerbabuena=Spearmint Flavor, Sabor Tutti Frutti=Tutti Frutti Flavor. The vendors are actually rather ruthless in the hawking of their wares, so those tiny packages of chewing pleasure probably cost 100 waifs their lives. So now you know that the burden and stigma of bloodshed taints your bag o’ crap.

Ghosted by shinymetallic @ 02/05/2004 11:04 PM EST

That "mohawked tyrannosaurus" is in fact a herbivorous dinosaur belonging to the "ornithosichian family" and it’s called corythosaurus. The mohawk is actually a crest made of bone. I was outraged that you actually thought it was a T-rex with a mohawk!! Have you tried chewing it? It looks like it would taste like orange – orange the colour, not to be mistaken with orange the fruit.

Ghosted by Machinegun Willy @ 02/22/2004 12:43 PM EST

Your Garfield pencil toper is not the only kind they have made i have a garfield orange standing up and when you push its tail its mouth opens!

Ghosted by Some Guy @ 04/21/2004 4:51 PM EDT

You can still get those "Six Pack" soda sand thingies. My sister buys them all the time and gives me the lemon and grape ones. The bottles look identical to the ones in the bag, exactly the same. Also, I should go through my garage sometime and mail some crap to Matt. A 50 gallon roughneck tub filled to the top with old mcdonalds/burger king/KFC ect toys. I’m not kidding.

Ghosted by EhhEff @ 06/05/2004 2:12 AM EDT

Hey that hose guy

http://www.x-entertainment.com/articles/0856/junk/2.html

was a fire fighter I think, I had some when I was a kid and there were red and white ones in various poses (like the little green army men).

Ghosted by Mr King @ 06/21/2004 9:01 PM EDT

i think whoever owned this bag first was a roots version of whoever runs this site … collecting the best (worst?) of pop culture crap … except he/she had no place to share all his/her glorious proof of american consumerism gone awry …

Ghosted by drasticDub @ 06/25/2004 5:23 PM EDT

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