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The Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade – 1985-1986!

Posted by Matt on 11/27/2003. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 84 comments

That was awesome… simply awesome…

Chestnuts roasted by MysteryGuyCalvin @ 11/28/2003 3:09 PM

Wow, the Bitner really is back. The whole Bitner extravaganza of a blog is truly truly truly outrageous in an unsolved mysteries kind of way…except its been solved!

Chestnuts roasted by Kennef @ 11/28/2003 4:16 PM

I only read through it briefly…has there been anything said that proves that it’s the real Bitner? (if we can find proof, I can probably do a full article on the Photog fiasco…and finally get up everyone’s Photog art, which is still saved on my HD)

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 11/28/2003 4:31 PM

That was excellent, Matt. Phyllis Diller was smashed! I’m suprised she was able to stay on the goose. Dolf Lundgren was really baked. Either that, or he had no brain cells to begin with. Pat Sajak is a luser, I don’t even like him on "Wheel".

Chestnuts roasted by Hope @ 11/28/2003 6:04 PM

I have the 86 parade tape too,and have been doing lundgren jokes about the "wheres vanna" line for years.

Nice to see its not just me who thinks its funny.You should see all the photoshoped shit ive done on thouse 2….oh man.

Chestnuts roasted by Craig @ 11/28/2003 8:19 PM

Man those clowns must’ve really killed Robert Vaughn’s career because he’s now doing commercials for some local lawyers. Damn those clowns!

Chestnuts roasted by Stacey @ 11/28/2003 8:57 PM

Bless you Matt. Now that i’ve finally gotten to see the He-Man float (and it did not disappoint) my life is almost complete. The only things left for me to do now are:

1)Appear in the studio audience of a Ron Popeil Infomercial. &

2)Get myself a pen like the one Bill Cosby used on "PicturePages" that makes crazy sounds when you write.

A man’s gotta have dreams

Chestnuts roasted by Goggles Pizano @ 11/29/2003 12:21 PM

Matt, again you’ve outdone yourself. Just for the record, the float that went all haywire and kiled some folks was Sonic the Hedgehog. Lousy Mario imitator. Never saw Mario mowing down three people. Who is Stepfanie Kramer anyway? Phyllis Diller and Lundgren clearly hung out at the same pre-show party. Jeez. Hey, I wonder if that insipid clown from 1984 that was clearly touching Joey Lawrence inappropriatly was one of those clowns trying to steal Robert Vaughn’s air time. I wonder about a lot of things. Like who thought giving Magic Johnson his own talk show was a good idea? Or what was that thing on Gorbachev’s head? Oh well. I could use some hot cocoa myself. Bye everybody!!

Chestnuts roasted by Tuff Daddy Cool @ 11/29/2003 1:56 AM

Awesome review!!!

Phyllis Diller drunk off her ass reminds me of my own grandma!

I have a hot wheels crack up still. I have the Top Bopper, but mine is red.

In the Yugo commercial the last guy says "we wanted a dependable fuckin’ car" I died of laughter. I watched it over and over, he says those words! See for yourself!!

Overall a great thanksgiving this year! I had good food and a great review of some parades from when i was in diapers. Great job Matt!

Chestnuts roasted by heeloyd @ 11/29/2003 2:55 AM

thats BS man, the best mcdonalds commercial was not the doodler one. Someone back me up on this that it really aired, all my friends don’t believe me. there was a mcdonalds commercial with this retarded guy working a register all talking about how great it is to work at mcdonalds, then this hot babe comes out, and he goes all retardedly "’is is ma girfrend, i et her a mcdona’s". funny, yet not supposed to be. does anyone else remember this?

Chestnuts roasted by UlicQel @ 11/29/2003 3:16 AM

I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact the Robert Vaughn was surrounded by clowns. Just the outright abusrdity of it. Just think of it. Someone thought that it was gonna be a good idea to surround Robert Vaughn with clowns WHILE READING A TRUNCATED VERSION OF THE PREAMBLE. On second thought, don’t think of it. I did it just now and my left side has gone numb. Stevie feels dizzy. Stevie’s gonna go lay down for a while.

Chestnuts roasted by Stevie G The Dance Machine @ 11/29/2003 3:34 AM

During the Yugo ad I swear the old dude says "we needed a dependable fuckin’ car" I mean, I KNOW he says second, but it sounds like fuckin’.

Chestnuts roasted by NotIan @ 11/29/2003 5:44 AM

They cost less, but you couldn’t knife a hole in their ass and fuck them.
Holy Shit! Funniest thing. Ever.

Chestnuts roasted by blastendedskrewt @ 11/29/2003 6:12 AM

Messed up thing about the Rocert Vaughn lawyer ads-I have seen them both here in Boston AND down in Georgia (for different law firms). I think it’s like one of those things where they shoot one "main" advert and when they show the graphic for the law firm they play a "personal" voice over. The first time I saw it was in Georgia and then when I came home I thought I was seeing things. Sad when all you remember about someone is them shilling for shysters and being annoyed by clowns.
What also amuses me is that Pat Sajak probably gets asked EVERYWHERE he goes about Vanna. He goes to the supermarket and people probably hound him about her…public restrooms, everywhere. Let’s face it-she’s the real star of the show, not him and he knows it and it really pisses him off. I mean seriously, she DID play "Venus the Goddes of Love" in a made for TV movie. What movies has Pat Sajak been in? How many best selling biographies has he written? Vanna’s bio was even called, "a Hell of a book" by Matt’s favorite Golden Girl, Dorothy. So Pat is probably bitter about living in the shadow of a woman who does little more than smile warmly, applaud, and turn letters (well, now all she does is touch the video screen). Pat’s life is pretty pathetic, if you ask me.

Chestnuts roasted by Killer Duck @ 11/29/2003 11:12 AM

Matt, feel LUCKY you never had a pet mouse… There’s a reason you can really only buy them out of the back room of pet stores as snake food. Sure, they look like cute & tiny rats, but they are not as calm, healthy, or smart, and make for miserable pets that only live 3-6 years. Imagine a lazy, paranoid, excessivley-pooping gold fish with teeth that hates you…

Anyway, the video of the ’85 MOTU float always cracks me up when Skeletor shows up. He FINALLY made it into Castle Greyskull, only to crawl out JUST to pick on Orko.

Chestnuts roasted by RewolfJ @ 11/30/2003 5:21 AM

I can’t see the clips. :(
O well, must be problems on my end. Anyway, great job Matt!

Chestnuts roasted by Whitney @ 11/30/2003 9:45 AM

Oh man, that Robert Vaughn thing is gold…

"Tell the insurance companies you mean BUSINESS! Call the (insert local attorney’s name) Law Office!"

Chestnuts roasted by FishEyekun @ 11/30/2003 8:06 PM

Did anyone notice that Robert Vaughn actually messed up when he was reciting the preamble to the constitution? Geez, I learned that in like the 4th grade. Maybe those clowns were making him nervous.. They’ll do that to ya. ::shudders::

Chestnuts roasted by LioConvoy @ 11/30/2003 10:08 PM

In Ohio, I’ve also spotted the Robert Vaughn commercials, just thought I’d add that.

Chestnuts roasted by Rob @ 11/30/2003 11:11 PM

happy thanksgiving and thank you for a great review. i laughed when i read the article since it was so funny. the commercials were great too. all of those mcdonalds commercials make me hungry. wasn’t the cosby commercial for the episode when they meet stevie wonder and record a song with him. great review and happy holiday.

Chestnuts roasted by Romo @ 12/01/2003 8:53 PM

i have no idea how you have the time to do what you do

Chestnuts roasted by puke7 @ 12/02/2003 4:43 AM

Matt your Macy’s Parade artical was awesome! Your comments on Sajak, Stepahnie Kramer, Phyillis Diller ect. was funny!
Now, you said in your artical, that you’ve spent hours trying to figure out how The SUPERMAN BALLOON lost his hand. Well, here’s somewhat of an answer-
CBS had covered the Parade that year from uptown.
Superman lost his hand from the start of the parade.It looked like his hand was tied in a knot at the wrist. I kid you not, seconds before the hand fell to the ground, they cut camra and he wasn’t seen again.
But, it wasn’t till the end of parade, CBS showed highlights of the parade while the credits were rolling. It showed a Superman Balloon handler picking the hand up off the ground (Still inflated I might add)and moving it off to the sidelines. Then the camra panned up at Superman with no hand. If I’m not mistaken he had gotten snagged on a tree limb.
Then during the parade Superman had encountered another problem.
If you look at your ’86 parade again, you will see (When Kermit the Frog is introduced) you will see in the background on the left side of the screen showing Superman swaying to the side. Then when Pat intros. The bag pipers paying you will see that Superman isn’t even there. He was lowered to the ground. But it isn’t till Pat introduces The Doodle Bug Float, you will see behind Pat, Superman is flying again. I don’t have an answer that.
Anyway, I hope you’d found it helpful and interesting.
I hope next year you’ll have more parade stuff.
Have A Great Holiday!!!

Chestnuts roasted by night-train2004 @ 12/05/2003 1:17 PM

I just wanted to add that I’m in the UK, know nothing of the Day parade or a lot of the people (Save for Dolph, Stefanie Kramer(!), Joey Laurence and Robert Vaughn) but still found it funny as hell. It’s almost something to rival ‘The Worst Witch’ review, but nothing quite beats Tim Curry and the elusive paper sun.

Chestnuts roasted by DrVenkman @ 12/14/2003 9:01 AM

I just wanted to add that I’m in the UK, know nothing of the Day parade or a lot of the people (Save for Dolph, Stefanie Kramer(!), Joey Laurence and Robert Vaughn) but still found it funny as hell. It’s almost something to rival ‘The Worst Witch’ review, but nothing quite beats Tim Curry and the elusive paper sun.

Chestnuts roasted by DrVenkman @ 12/14/2003 9:03 AM

I just have to say that this is, by far, my favorite entry on the site! I spent hours one day at work watching all the clips and reading the comments–i havent laughed that hard in ages. It’s funny how the only part of that parade that gave me deja-vu was the clip of Joey Lawrence and the Cabbage Patch Kids ;) ;)

Chestnuts roasted by Amy @ 01/07/2004 10:45 AM

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