The X-Entertainment Blog

09/19/2003: Amazin’ Fruit Super Fruits!

The movie review I planned to have up today is going to take a bit longer — it’s a big ass one, and if I rush through it, it’ll suck, so what’s the point? Might try to sneak it up for the weekend, but if not, Monday the latest. Those starved for content should head over to the Halloween Countdown, as it’s been updated early with a look at two different types of — come on, guess — sticky eyeballs!

Oh, remember a few weeks back when I mentioned all that expired food I found at the dollar store? Here’s one of the treasures. You might recall these packages being mentioned in the Amazin’ Fruit tribute, but obviously, I never thought I’d find ‘em again. They’re big, they’re super, and they’re fruit shaped…

Yep, “Amazin’ Fruit Super Fruits,” quite clearly marked as being from 1994. I gotta admit, I was way too excited to find ten-year-old gummy snacks, and I don’t think the lady working the register appreciated my enthusiasm. I swear, I’ve been doing this whole “buying old food” thing for a while now, and I’m always amazed at how the storeowners and workers act as if you’re committing a crime by purchasing what they’ve left out on the shelves in perfect view. I don’t know if they smell a lawsuit or what, but goddamn — if you don’t want me to buy your half-full case of Amazin’ Fruit Super Fruits, don’t show the things to me. Seriously, am I supposed to willingly resist something like that? Especially for dollar store prices? More amazin’ than the Amazin’ Fruit itself was the fact that it hadn’t gone at all stale — they’re legitimately a decade old, but they taste as sweet as yesterday.

All sorts of fruit flavors and all sorts of fruit shapes combine to form a king sized fat free ultramegasuper candy offering. These things don’t match the charm of the original Amazin’ Fruit’s obscene teddy bears, but between you and me, I think these actually taste even better. And they thought it wasn’t possible!

Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

You know, today is National Talk Like a Pirate day, so saying "eye" isn’t too far off. Sure, it should be "aye", but it’s close. And sticky eyes so cool it is okay to make puns of them, anyway!

Okay, maybe they aren’t THAT cool, but they are at least interesting. You looked great in that last pic, Matt!

I keep forgeting it’s tomorrow in New York before it’s tomorrow in Arizona. HEY! I’m saying hello to the future! Hello, future! How are things? Is the world still here 6 hours from now?

Mmmmmm, Amazin’ Fruit! I want some! Or should I say, EYE want some. Know what else EYE want? EYE want everEYEone to go check out mEYE new onlEYEne comic, "the Retarded Adventures of Megaman" at http://www.scotty2naughty.tk. Once there, just click on the "Cruiz Control" link to read mEYE latest comic. A new one goes up tomorrow. So go on bEYE there sometEYEme tomorrow for plentEYE of hilaritEYE!!!

First, I want matt to SHOW us the expiration date on those Amazin’ Fruits. I won’t believe it till I see it with my own two (eleven) eyes.

Second, I’d REALLY like the scotty2naughty guy to quit spamming the blog. We’ve seen it a hundred times now, okay? We get enough popups on this site. >_<

Aye, Eye enjoyed the review. I agree with the Don Knotts comment, and with the comment about the last photo being creepy. It’s comical. ^^

Sticky eyes (the squishy ones) suck. We still have a 16 foot grease stain where a sticky eye was throw on a high wall. Stupid eye.

A couple of things:
1. Matt you’re insane, keep to eating good food (defined as less than 10yrs old).
2. Is this Halloween countdown going to be like the Advent Calendar? I still want to know what was behind the X-mas day door.
3. Why has there never been any MASK on this site?

Due to my last 7 or so Halloweens being dissapointing, Oct 31 is not my favorite date. But Matt makes it all fun again. Heck, I’m thinking of dressing up, even without a party to go to!

Holy hell, Freezeair, I think youre onto something. Time travel IS possible, through the internet! Now for marketing..

Weird, I just bought a pack of Super Fruits at some random cornerstore a few weeks ago. I had a choice between Super Fruits and the classic (kind of) Amazin Fruit bears, but went with the shit in the yellow package. I figured eating grapes has to be better for you than eating bears. Even if they are made out of sugar.

As an afterthought, Scotty2Naughty does need to chill. This is one of the few places you can go without being spammed right in the face. Lets keep it that way please.

Well, minus the skin colour… And hair colour… And that weird eye thing Matrix has…

I’m w/ the people on Scotty2naughty. If you want to advertise your website do like me and fill in the Homepage option when you make a comment.

P.S: Matt, for shame, no edible CHOCLATE eyeballs that come wrapped in tin foil decorated to look like an eye?.

Eye haven’t read it yet, but im going to, im sure it will be funny. Eye can’t beleive you ate 10 year old candy. you could get ill and lie there, so weak from shitting yourself that you’d be unable to type.

Those sticky eyes arn’t that new. I had a package about five years ago. The best thing to do with them is to shove nails through them for haunted houses.

Don’t go Trick Or Treating in a William Shatner mask. You might be confused for Michael Myers, get hit by a truck, and burst into a fireball. Just like in Halloween 2.

I went for one final walk on the Wildwood Boardwalk last night before my hours at the Acme are cut to hell and the boards shut down. I investigated some of the dollar stores in the hope of finding something weird, wild, or vaguely edible. No Amazin’ Fruit (or even bears), but I did see some candy bars with promotions from, oh, three or four years ago on them.

Actually, the "speaking to the future" thing is sort of an old in-joke from an online group I was in. A large portion of us were from somewhere in the States, and then there was this one girl from Australia… we always used to make jokes about her being from the future. ^^ But hey, if I can spread the joy, so be it!

"eye" liked that review. I’m not suprised those gummies are still they have so many persavites in them.

Ohh,amazing fruit.I loved those cherries.Actually I noticed that they look a little familar…holy crap they’re the same candies from the churches candy dispenser!They just put them in different packages!AHHH!!!

I wish the dollar stores areound here were like yours matt. We never get anything old, due to the old folks home right next door. Them old people buy everything and anything.

Candle holders, tacky picture frames, cheap-ass candles, and packs of tiny envelopes, that’s all you get down my way

if you need to charge up anything that glows in the dark, the best source of light is your tv. the uv light it gives off makes things glow like crazy. (this tip includes glow in the dark squishy eyeballs, i have experience).

i just saw mtv cribs just now. it had fieldy from korn’s house, and he had a room with tons of glow in the dark stuff all over the place and fluorecsent lights that made it all glow, it was cool/tacky and good at the same time but weird and freaky too.

Matt, I got popcorn balls. I’m gonna IM you sometime this week and maybe we can work out a deal….XD

Since Amazin’ Fruit have reared their gummi heads once again on this site, I feel compelled to do this…

IT’S AMAZIN’ FRUIT! YEAH!
IT’S OUR AMAZIN’ FRUIT! YEAH!
IT’S AMAZIN’ FRUIT! YEAH!
AMAAAAZIN’ FRUIT!

There, now you’ll all have that goddamned theme song stuck in your heads for the next three months. Why should I be the only one who feels the pain?

Dulie noted. I’ll stop whoring my comic, or at least cut down on it a lot. I only just started, which is why I’m looking for an audience.

Oh, and I’m NOT Scotty2Naughty. My name is A-wel Cruiz. S2N owns the site that hosts my comic.

Yes, tar-jay. I am not nearly classy enough to pronounce it that way. At least not until they lift the ban from when i dropped my pants in the candy section.

F-13 rules! that is exactly what I thought. EYEgor was even his name in Young Frankenstein

I remember one time I went to Circle K, my friend was working so I ate lots of free hot dogs, sodas, candies, etc. and I found a package of Tangy Taffy from 1995, hidden underneath Laffy Taffy, even though they are from two different companies (Sunshine Brands and Wonka). I took the candy home, unwrapped it, but instead of being blue colored, it was a grayish purple. I microwaved it and ate it anyways, and nothing happened, it was really sweet though. Oh yea, here in Arizona its pronounced Target, not Tarjay, and I hate that store, I quit my job their 3 weeks ago because the managers are assholes.

That’s why I called you scotty2naughty guy, instead of scotty2naughty. I’m much to lazy to remember how to spell the other one by the time I’ve gotten to the "add comments" box.

Didn’t anyone like Wonka bars? There’s still several places around here that have them promoting the golden ticket contest from a couple years ago; I made the mistake of buying one thinking it had to be a new contest; instead I just got a bar of stale chocolate.

Let’s review: Amazin’ Fruit rules even after a decade; Spamming sucks; Halloween is fun. Sounds good.

huh it said 21th instead of 21st now today is 22th, what is that? Twenty-twoth? Twenty-tooth?

Commenting on today’s(The 22nd) article, scarily enough I once bought a box of Pokemon cereal as a collector’s item.

I don’t know. Maybe I’ll show it to my kids one day. There’s probably enough preservatives in there.

(this blog is on the 9-22-03 review) Are you going to review the kid cusine Halloween meal as one of the Halloween themed food?

Is anyone else thinking that if you put all the things Matt reviewed so far in the same bowl, it would be the scariest thing ever?

Great updates for the halloween spooooky countdown. I also lament the loss of halloween spirit. A lot of parents make their kids trick or treat on the closest weekend to halloween, during the daylight hours. What the fuck is up with that?

As for online comics, I think the ‘Retarded Adventures of Toilet Duck Fan’ would be much funnier.

I don’t know what to say. As far as I can tell, my Halloween is going to be yet another disappointing one. God I miss those days of getting tons of free candy (Who cares if it’s shitty? It’s free.) and eating it all within approximately the next 1-2 days.

Now that I go to a "Christian" University, all I hear about is how Halloween is "evil" and is "Satan’s Day." God I hate "Christians." (But I do like real Christians who aren’t a bunch of irrational fundamentalists).

In response to kit’s comment I know people take their kids out trick or treating in a mall!

Liek 10 year old Amazin’ Fruit, I conider this blog entry too old for human use. I claim the last post!

Who said anything about class?? XD XD I think its just more evidence that I live around morons. Accursed Bay Area.

I used to work at a dollar store of sorts, and I can remember finding bags of gummy candies (not Amazin Fruit, sadly) that had really old expiration dates. And the same goes for movie themed cereal. I had to throw away an entire shelf of Star Wars cereal just because it was two years old. Seems like a waste to me..I’m sure it didn’t taste that bad.

dammit! my amazin fruits are not stale or 10 years old! its NEW amazinf fruit you bastards!

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This entry was posted on Friday, September 19th, 2003 at 8:42 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.