The Countdown's been updated with a fast look at a fast cookie — Nabisco's new Halloween Oreos!  It's September 30th — we're on the cusp of October, and finally, the weather wizards around here have realized that it's no longer summer.  I swear we hit 90° this past weekend, so my attempt to break out the fall sweater collection was met with perspiration and depression..but NOW IT'S COLD AND NOBODY CAN TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME.  The real pisser is, we keep praying for fall weather, and once it hits, all we're gonna think about is how much we miss summer.  Seriously, that's all we'll think about.  Not work, not what's for dinner, not our families and loved ones — just a constant pining for warm weather.  Still, that comes later — it's cold, and nobody can take that away from me.  Nobody, baby!

Ever wondered what would happen if Krang, the evil pink brain from Dimension X, was roped into babysitting half of the Marvel Universe?  Click here to find out!  When you're done, do me a favor and pay a little visit to Play Along Toys, who were nice enough to send me some packages of the "Marvel MiniMates" figures, free of charge.  Enjoy!

La la la, here's a quick look back at an Atari rarity, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  Pretty awful little game that was kept off most store shelves for being "too violent," even though the pictures tell a different story.  Also, the Halloween Countdown rages on with a haunted brainteaser, plus reviews of Kid Cuisine's "Haunted Halloween Meal" and brand new and totally gigantic "Marshmallow Peeps Bats."

Last week I talked about a little road trip to an allegedly haunted location — well, we went, but made the mistake of going late at night.  Since this place is stashed in the middle of the woods, it was just too dark to find entry or anything else of note.  All we got was this picture of a cross-shaped old fountain…

Look closely and you'll see remnants of past keg parties and drug sessions.  Yeah, real haunted.  We're heading back soon during daytime hours, so hopefully, I'll have more to show you down the road.  Meantime, check this out — remember that contest UGO ran several months back for that transforming shoe?  I know a few people who got there from X-E won prizes, so I've got no problems shooting a plug towards their latest giveaway…a remote-controlled sneaker?

No, really.  A remote-controlled "Vapor TD" by Nike.  Pretty odd, but definitely cool.  I know firsthand that the contests they run are on the up and up — there's no mandatory mailing list sign-up, or anything of the sort.  If you want a shot at the shoe that moves, click here to enter.

"RMK" just sent in a fantastic e-mail: "The other day I was cleaning out our hall closet, and for whatever reason someone had stored a stack of late 80s magazines and newspapers in the back. With nothing better to do on a weekend I looked through the pile before sending it to the recycling bin, and low and behold I found two things that I normally wouldn't have given a second glance to had it not been for recent mentions in X-Entertainment stories.  First off, a copy of "USA Today" from June 2 1986…..I noticed the little snapshot graphic. I know this looks like a photoshopped picture, but I still have the whole sheet, so I can prove its not if need be.  Check out the fifth greatest selling video cassette of all time circa 1986."

"Secondly, I found a Variety magazine from the 1988 Cannes Film Festival. Guess what film was screened at that esteemed gathering of film critics and glamorous stars….."Nukie"! I can just imagine Roger Ebert - who brags about seeing every last film presented at the yearly event - sitting through this flick."

Awesome stuff, RMK.  I'd be truly amazed if USA Today's facts weren't a bit screwy, because I just can't see Clue: The VCR Game gaining that much momentum without word-of-mouth negative advertising killing it off first.  It wasn't a terrible game for the time, and it felt "special" in a less technologically advanced decade, but come on…the proof is in the pudding.  The rest of the list seems off, too.  Michael Jackson's "The Making of Thriller" was the third best-selling video ever?

As for Nukie, I'd guess that the page you scanned is just about the only print promotion the film ever enjoyed.  Most of the films I've reviewed were awful in their own special way, but Nukie was awful in absolutely every way imaginable.  I've never seen a group of people put so much effort into something so obviously terrible at every turn.  The only people I've ever spoken to who were able to sit through the thing were fellow reviewers of bad movies, so you can imagine the drive and motivation it'd take for a regular audience to make it through.

Incidentally, I haven't watched the flick yet, but there's a weird old movie sitting on the shelf here that stars some kind of alien puppet thing, and strike me down if I'm wrong, but based on the box art, the guy looks exactly like Nukie, save for a glued-on cotton beard.  It's entirely possible that the Nukie suit showed up for another shitty movie, and if that turns out to be true, you can bet on a review sometime soon.

Today's Countdown entry investigates Hostess' new series of Halloween-themed snack cakes, ranging from "Glo Balls" to regular donuts with a picture of Frankenstein on the box.  Good fun.  Thanks to "Ron S." for sending in the tip.  Also, if you missed it, Dracula told a joke during yesterday's entry.  It's all here.  Hope everyone's liking it so far — it definitely helps keep things flowing during busy weeks like this one, where I don't really have enough time to crank out the full-lengthers.  We're going on a bit of a trek tomorrow night, towards something mysterious, spooky, and possibly filled with homeless crack addicts.  Seriously.  If the pictures tell the tale well enough, I'll have a good story for y'all next week.

By the way, I'm still getting a decent amount of mail regarding that Wendy's article, both from staff and managers of various Wendy's restaurants across the country.  The consensus is that the place I got that food from was a little grittier than the norm, though almost unanimously, I've been told to avoid the chili at all costs.  Take that for what it's worth, chili fans.  Basically, they've all agreed that Wendy's chili is the one thing on the menu most of the staff avoids like the plague.

This week's Top Eleven, kind of a quickie, takes a look back ay my favorite movie sequels.  I'm sure a few (or everyone) will debate the list, but I figured I'd stay true to what I felt instead of writing about some of the more popular sequels I've either never seen or just don't have much of an interest in.  It's the list that puts "Gremlins 2" in the top spot and totally excludes "Godfather II," so yeah, I know, I'm asking for it.  Actually, don't read it yet, because I somehow frigged up the editing and chopped off what should've been in the top three.  Hello, McFly, I'm a fool.

Last night, we visited one of my sisters, and her son broke out the paper and crayons for a "look at what I'm drawing, everyone!" session.  You know how that goes.  Taken with the Halloween spirit, he debuted a masterpiece: Frankenstein, with red fangs, red eyes, and a biker jacket covered in knives.  We got into a discussion over what would be the worst way to get killed by this particular Frankenstein, both agreeing that the jacket blades were a far worse fate than the oddly red teeth.  I dunno, to me, that's what this season is all about.  The Countdown has been updated with a look at a Halloween staple — phony spider webs.

Wow, been a while since a full-length article, so here it is.  Halloween Is Grinch Night, the 1977 television special that cast new horrors for a new holiday on the friendly Whos of Whoville, gave us one last look at an animated Grinch before Jim Carrey shattered the image forever with that burping-green-smoke scene in the live action film.  I had to can the planned movie review, as it was shaping up to be around three times longer than the Grinch article.  It's on the backburner until I decide it's just and right to spend 40 hours writing about a movie sixteen people will care about, so for now, just enjoy your silly Grinch.

Oh, if you haven't noticed, I've been keeping my promise with the Halloween Countdown.  The past three entries take a look at Oozeified Body Parts, Freaky Froot Loops, and the one I personally find the most interesting, Mattel's late-70s Gre-Gory the Vampire Bat.  I'm definitely digging the Countdown thing so far; I just hope I don't go broke by November spending all of this money on expensive spider rings and expensive cotton spider webs.  Just so you know, I'm stocked up to carry us well into mid October, so if I'm going to fuck up with the Countdown, at least it won't be for a few weeks.

While I'm here, let's do some quick Reader Mail.  I don't know why I capitalized it; it just felt right.
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