Hi Dad! Where have you been? What’s that? Orko has one of those under his skirt? And it looks like Mario Lopez? Strange. Yes, I’ll have some, pass the bottle please…
Ghosted by BotchieGulpe @ 04/23/2003 4:21 PM EDT
Is He-Man drinking vodka? Sweet. He should try Ultra Tide Free laundry detergent. Take a sniff next time you’re in the grocery store: smells just like Absolut, but gets your insides brighter and whiter.
Ghosted by Molten @ 04/23/2003 4:32 PM EDT
Teddy Ruxpin with a knife? I’m having nightmares for a month now…
Oh, god, oh god, oh god!!!
First, I click on the 80sTees ad and get the fucking Monchichi’s theme song stuck in my head, and now I get He-Man staring me down with what looks like a bottle of tequila!
There’s no way in hell I’m sleeping tonight.
Ghosted by Patty nO'More @ 04/23/2003 5:24 PM EDT
Hell Yea!
Ghosted by Orgg @ 04/23/2003 5:31 PM EDT
Hey, everyone parties sometime.
Ghosted by Sargasm @ 04/23/2003 5:36 PM EDT
Wow, I went to Zellers the other day (in Canada) and was I in for a treat 50% off easter candy.
My take home loot:
Cadbury Cream eggs x 2 – as per Matts Artical
Cadbury Truffle eggs x 2 – A little to mutch truffle stuff for my tastes
Dove Truffle eggs x 2 – Way better than the Cadbury one, actually tastes like a truffle
Cadbury Wonderbar eggs x 2 – Strange
Cadbury Caramilk eggs x 2 – Stickier than a cream egg but pretty darn tasty.
Cadbury Dream Eggs x 2 – Like a Cadbury cream egg but its white chocolate and has a more dairy-ish goo inside.
All of that for just under $5.00 Canadian. And because of socialized health care here I don’t have to pay for the double bypass either.
What I still cannot figure out is if the U.S. of A is junk food central, how come all of these damn foriegners are getting all the good candy and chips? Now THAT’S worth going to war over.
Ghosted by jthm @ 04/23/2003 7:36 PM EDT
So Queen Marlena brought the good stuff with her from Earth? Or was that something the cop had stashed away in that half of a car?
What do I know? I drink Sprite at nightclubs.
Ghosted by ShadowWing the Technorganic Autobot @ 04/23/2003 8:41 PM EDT
Oh, I wanted to beat Koz to the punch: I like pants! (runs away)
Ghosted by ShadowWing again @ 04/23/2003 8:41 PM EDT
I wore the G.I. Joe version for halloween ‘86/87
Ghosted by Spaz @ 04/23/2003 9:51 PM EDT
i remember when He-man showed up at my house with Vodka …….
Ghosted by Runnin wit scissors @ 04/24/2003 3:11 AM EDT
HE-MAN: "This guy here…this is the guy right here…"
MAN-AT-ARMS: "Uh, He-Man…I think you’ve had enough…"
HE-MAN: "You don’t know me, man!"
TEELA: "Jesus, this happens at EVERY Christmas party!"
HE-MAN: "I’m sorry (sob)…so sorry. I love you so much Teela…"
TEELA: "Let go of my tits, you sicko!"
Ghosted by The Yeti @ 04/24/2003 9:12 AM EDT
No shit –
when I was 11, I saw my first childs play movie. It was the second one. I watched it with my mom, and even at 11, I knew how rediculously not scary it was. It had it’s jump scenes, but it was still my buddy. During a commercial break (it was on USA) my mom was able to sneak upstairs for a "cup of coffee" which losely translates to "scare the living fuck out of my kid for eternity." What she did was take my "My Buddy" from my closet, and taped a real knife into his hand, she then covered him under the blankets in my bed, and returned downstairs to finish the movie. The movie was over, I went upstairs, played a few rounds of Nintendo, and decided to turn in for the night.
I turned off all the lights, pulled back my covers, and saw that knife gleaming. I totally freaked out.
I killed my mom that night, and burried her in the backyard. It isn’t so funny now is it mom?!? IS IT?!?!? ISSSSSSSSSSSSS IT!
Considering that there was just an article about them, I thought people might like to see some weird coloured knock offs of Transformers cassettes. If nothing else, they’re a lot cheaper.
Marlena smuggling in the good stuff. . .next thing you know, they’re gonna pull Frostbite over with an open two-four in the trunk of the Snow Cat. Of course, when you have six missiles attached to your arctic assault half-track vehicle, you can probably intimidate a traffic cop out of a DUI ticket.
(Now I understand why my parents were angsty about me playing with "boy’s toys": they thought I’d spend my adult years making esoteric references to toys that were discontinued almost twenty years ago on other people’s blogs. Well, screw it — they should’a’ marketed better girl toys).
Ghosted by Molten @ 04/24/2003 10:07 AM EDT
If I weren’t high, that’d freak me out.
Ghosted by Mr. Peanut @ 04/24/2003 2:01 PM EDT
I think the big question is…who is that behind the mask. The eyes dont have that half asleep "please god just kill me now" look we usually see in Matt’s eyes.
Ghosted by Gozer @ 04/24/2003 2:07 PM EDT
i’m afaraid. very afraid.
he-man never looked so menacing.
Ghosted by evin @ 04/24/2003 2:56 PM EDT
also: i have a feeling it is a child behind the mask, because the costume is obviously meant for kids, and whoever is behind it seems too small for it.
perhaps matt is actually a midget, and thus far has employed special camera techniques so as not to seem such? hmm?
i just got the entire wrapper off of a big cadbury egg in one piece! go me! and go drunken he-man!
Ghosted by ashley @ 04/24/2003 4:12 PM EDT
hey guys. i just saw mayor mccheese dance the hustle in a VERY RECENT mcdonald’s video cassette. i totally find cooler stuff at thrift stores than you.
Well aren’t you just the bee’s knees? I didn’t know shopping for useless junk was a competition, or I would have put on my special jumpsuit. What so hard about finding a "VERY RECENT" video? Why even go to the thrift store? Couldn’t you just go to the Golden Arches? @_@
Ghosted by good for you! hugs all around! @ 04/24/2003 7:32 PM EDT
who names themselves after a desk, anyway?
Ghosted by re: pupitre @ 04/24/2003 7:35 PM EDT
mmm.. yea i coulda, but i’m pretty sure it woulda cost more than the 50 CENTS THAT I PAID FOR IT OH YEA I ROCK!!!!!!
Does anyone else remember the Consumers store chain? It was basically a waiting room with counters that had catalogs on them. You would search through and get the code for the item you wanted and go to the cashier window. They would have someone in the huge rear of the store then send up you item.
I wore that costume for Halloween in Kindergarten…only without the booze.
Ghosted by Goggles Pizano @ 04/25/2003 12:33 PM EDT
I know someone who always looks like that.
Ghosted by Lint @ 04/25/2003 10:15 AM EDT
If you do make X-E shirts Matt, may I suggest you go with this funny company. http://www.tshirthell.com/
Ghosted by Stretchy @ 04/25/2003 3:01 PM EDT
is that the outfit you make your missus wear?
ho ho ho
i once had the skeletor armour and mask set.
it came with a tiny stadff though
Ghosted by tin man @ 04/25/2003 3:02 PM EDT
I used to love Consumers Distributing. It was like ordering through a catalog only you got your stuff immediately. No pushy sales clerks. Without having to worry about displays they could pack alot of product into thier back warehouse. If they advertised an item as being for sale they always had it. I never left consumers empty handed as a kid. You want a new Cobra Khan, BAM, there it is. Snake Eyes version 3, CRACK, here ya go, Ewok Village playset. WHOOSH, all yours kid.
Not like today when you have to go to the manufacturers website just to find out whats available, then hit numerous Zellers, K-Marts, Wal-Marts and Sears(es) hoping to find the product you want. I wonder where the business model fell apart on Consumers Dist. No huge overhead in that business model. It was an entire Department store that could be run by five people, three cashiers and two warehouse guys and it was impossible to shoplift in.
CONSUMERS DISTRIBUTING RULES!!! WHOO!!! YAH!!!
I’m a poor poor sheltered person. this consumers distributing sounds like the holy grail I have almost always searched for! The only problem is that you have to look through almost everything to find what you want, or just the lack of impulse buying. That’s the only reason the big retailers beat everything else…impulse. DAMN DIRTY HUMANS AND THIER BAD HABBITS!
Ghosted by brandon @ 04/25/2003 3:09 PM EDT
Consumers ruled! We had one near us growing up.
I agree with Goblin; how’d it fail?
Ghosted by Atomic Punk @ 04/25/2003 3:49 PM EDT
I had the Hordak costume as a kid.
Hordak kicked all sorts of ass..
Ghosted by Bloodcat @ 04/25/2003 5:28 PM EDT
the "consumers" store sounds like englands "argos".
but in argos, you look in the catalogue, fill out the form, and when you get to the till you wait 15 minutes before the wanker behind the counter tells you theyve run out of what ever you were buying.
Ghosted by 'tin man @ 04/25/2003 7:25 PM EDT
HeMan: "Hey She-Ra,Hows about me and Yous get Naked and you can whip out the strap-on while i rub butter on my nipples.."
She-Ra: "Hmm..How about you put down the bottle and take off my panties Freak!…Thats the last time i let Man-O-Arms give you GAY lessons……."
Ghosted by HeMansAnigger @ 04/25/2003 7:36 PM EDT
Well, at least his breastplate is clearly labeled "He-man" so he can find it in the morning.
Ghosted by Black Zarak @ 04/25/2003 8:44 PM EDT
With all the chestplates in Eternia, nametags became essential.
I also remember Consumers. My mom went there quite often and I used to browse the cataloges even if I wasn’t able to get anything. I think a good portion of my Star Wars collection from that time came from there. I miss it.
Ghosted by ShadowWing the Technorganic Autobot @ 04/25/2003 9:23 PM EDT
I guess for Teela the chestplate thing would be a quid pro quo- Tit for Tat, if you know what I mean. I guess with all those big-chested individuals it could be confusing… By the way she had such a lovely embroidery… golden rings of desire… "My, what lovely Teelas you have there my dear…"
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Posted by Matt. 
Ghosted by 
Hi Dad! Where have you been? What’s that? Orko has one of those under his skirt? And it looks like Mario Lopez? Strange. Yes, I’ll have some, pass the bottle please…