02/12/2003: Return of the Jedi Erasers?
New Article: I won’t be satisfied until we’ve looked at every last one of He-Man’s friends and foes, so today’s article is all about Sy-Klone, the only Masters of the Universe character who can turn into a tornado. Tons of bonuses in this one - aside from the standard review, you can download the original commercial and read his old mini-comic, page by page.
Here’s something I wanted to have up on the site, but knew I’d never actually write a full article about. I’ve written about tigers and mysterious pink boxes, but I doubt I could get too far in a speech about Return of the Jedi erasers…
For your viewing pleasure: an almost-complete picture gallery of all the school supplies and kiddie baubles from Return of the Jedi. I’ve had most of these. The Yoda figural eraser was actually the first Star Wars item I’ve ever owned, having been given to me by my brother who felt the eraser smelled just a little bit too much like candy. Indeed, it smelled so much like candy that I couldn’t help biting Yoda’s ears off and eating them. I don’t think they were toxic, but I still throw up whenever I see erasers sheerly by association. Thanks, Yoda. I know you can barely tell what these items are from their linking pics, so just consider each one a special new surprise. Click on the pictures to see the full-sized versions…



There’s your little dog and pony show. Tomorrow’s article should be good - it’s about the most famous cereal premium of all time, a small-but-spirited item that had the kind of fad power to take in nearly 80 million dollars from the U.S. alone. I’ve been keeping up a pretty decent schedule with the article frequency, no? Just goes to show you how far fifteen cups of coffee at 7 AM can actually take you. I’ve got a huge lot of stuff to review coming on in - not movies this time, but actual stuff. These are the kind of things that really can’t be reviewed unless I’ve got them in my hands to fondle and take pictures of, so figure on a heavy dose of firsthand item examinations real soon. What the fuck am I talking about? Guess I need a sixteenth cup.
By the way, enter your name in that Sony Watchman contest if you haven’t already. I’m serious when I say that it’s in no way a come-on - I personally know the people responsible for both putting the contest together and sending out the prizes, and they’re basically just trying to clear out old warehouse stock. Again, if you’re one of the winners, make sure you e-mail me to let me know.

Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

Discussion Thread: 30 comments
Hooray, my whale art made it into the gallery…just before the cut-off apparently.
Nice He-Man article, too.
When my medieval lit prof asked us too fill out these little "get to know you" cards, one of the questions was "When and where would you go if you had a time machine?" I said America, 1981. I’m sure he thinks I’m a genius.

Posted by
Ubu Rex @ 02/12/2003 11:57 AM EST
Ha, I had the Yoda wallet. Cheap, cheap plastic. Damn thing broke the first time I used it. I hate Yoda.

Posted by
Squid Head @ 02/12/2003 12:50 PM EST
I still have my YODA eraser!!!! it is in my STARWARS carrying case, under my grandma’s bed. I used that as a pretend Yoda, because my REAL Yoda was too special to me to use in regular play. I chewed on Princess Leia’s bounty hunter mask so much I am surprised i didn’t choke on it.

Posted by
t-rah @ 02/12/2003 1:53 PM EST
I’m pretty sure those items could fetch a few pennys on ebay.

Posted by
Big Will @ 02/12/2003 1:55 PM EST
I was just partaking in the joy that is the whale section and i read something disturbing…Frenchy from American Idol was in porn???? please explain this disturbing disturbing news? wasn’t she the somewhat heavy girl with the great voice? she was my favorite! get back to me please!

Posted by
t-rah @ 02/12/2003 1:59 PM EST
A lot of people thought she was gonna win. Yeah it’s true, or at least according to what Robin said on Stern today. The pink-haired dark horse rumbunny seems to have had a colorful past checkered with side trips to the Pornorama. Plus she just had these - amazing - big huge monster hands.

Posted by
Matt @ 02/12/2003 2:03 PM EST
Spikor would kick the shit out of Frenchy from American Idol with his deadly body spikes.

Posted by
The Toixc Avenger @ 02/12/2003 2:15 PM EST
My friend Brodi wants to know if Spikor is completely covered in spikes even his dork. Then that would mean he could never get laid, which explains why he fights for the forces of evil. (Sorry for the consecutive posts, there is just something about that Spikor)

Posted by
The Toxic Avenger @ 02/12/2003 2:19 PM EST
Well there’s two theories on this.
1) He has no spikes anywhere else from the waist down, so he doesn’t have a spiky dick.
2) His torso and head are all spikes, so his pipi is probably spiked too.
I think you should ask Mario Lopez since he’s down wit He-man.
http://www.theotherhalf.tv probably has an email addy to him.

Posted by
Casey Jones @ 02/12/2003 3:22 PM EST
I think I may actually have been the only kid ever to own a Sy-Klone figure. For whatever reason, I made him a serious ‘bad ass’ out of my He-Man figures, before I knew he sucked so much. No weapon, and a stupid radar in his chest? WTF?

Posted by
Evan @ 02/12/2003 4:05 PM EST
I had him. He was the first to die. Fisto lived longer when I needed some casualities on the good guy’s side. MAN AT ARMS lived longer than Sy-Clone. When the man with the penis shaped head lives longer than you, it’s pretty sad.
I think I’d have Sy-Clone be the jobber of my action figure wrestling leagues too. Two-Bad, who just punched himself in the face all the time, even got a win over him, I think.

Posted by
Casey Jones @ 02/12/2003 4:13 PM EST
Ok, maybe someone out there can answer this one. There used to be a tv show where the gimmick was that you could "control the action." This entailed buying a light gun-type toy and firing at the bright flashing lights during the space ship battle scenes. I think that the toy gun would then make noises and sound like you were kicking the evil spacemen’s asses.
This was a regular tv show, not a game or anything like that. If anyone knows what this, please tell me so I can once again sleep at night.
Matt, if you know, could you maybe do an article on it?

Posted by
Ronnie Pruitt @ 02/12/2003 5:56 PM EST
Captain Power?

Posted by
Matt @ 02/12/2003 5:59 PM EST
I’m thinking it was maybe Captain Power. During some scenes, parts of the screen flashed weirdly, and you could use the various spaceships or gun thingies to make sounds that would inspire your mother to start drinking. I’m pretty sure I still have a couple of those toys somewhere…

Posted by
Patrick @ 02/12/2003 6:27 PM EST
YES!
Captain Power and the Soldiers of the Future! Damn that show rocked. I don’t know what made me think of that, but it’s been driving me crazy.
Thanks Matt!

Posted by
Ronnie Pruitt @ 02/12/2003 6:27 PM EST
On the note of Sy-Clone, how could you say his career ended with his stupid comic? He was in the new show! So far, though, he’s only been in one episode, the name of which escapes me. Skeletor stole some stones from him that turned He-Man and him into invinceable samurai. Sy-Clone almost killed himself, but He-Man stopped him. Fucking He-Man.

Posted by
Random, faceless geek @ 02/12/2003 6:46 PM EST
Captain Power was created by the director of the live-action He-Man movie, Gary Goddard (He company, Landmark Entertainmnet, is one of the top interactive ride designers and he also created Skeleton Warriors; landmarkusa.com)and the creator of Babylon 5, J. Michael Straczynski.
http://www.captainpower.com

Posted by
Tank @ 02/12/2003 7:20 PM EST
Hey Matt, it’s about time you got the forum back up and running. If you can do this, I will send you my Optimus Prime (with a missing arm) toy that I tossed at my brother during one of my legendary temper tantrums from yesteryear.

Posted by
OJ Simpson @ 02/12/2003 7:21 PM EST
There are some Captain Power VHS tapes at my local Half Price Books, as well as a few other of those types of games. Maybe I should get them.

Posted by
Ubu Rex @ 02/12/2003 8:31 PM EST
The site linked has Captain power episodes on a DVD

Posted by
tank @ 02/12/2003 8:53 PM EST
Hey, don’t mean to make an anal retentive comment or anything, but did you notice in Sy-Clone’s comic that at the top of one page, the narration (if you can call it that) refers to him as Tornado. Hey, think about it.

Posted by
Andy @ 02/12/2003 11:42 PM EST
"The Yoda figural eraser was actually the first Star Wars item I’ve ever owned, having been given to me by my brother who felt the eraser smelled just a little bit too much like candy. Indeed, it smelled so much like candy that I couldn’t help biting Yoda’s ears off and eating them."
Sometimes it scares me to read the things you write. I sometimes feel as if I have a cyber clone. I remember the sweet candy smell of the Yoda eraser. I fear mine met the same end as yours. I still have mine, and he’s missing his ears. To this day, I can’t recall what happened to them. If my stomach could talk, I’m sure it would help me recall the whereabouts of many of my childhood toys…

Posted by
Darth Joe @ 02/13/2003 2:06 AM EST
excuse me for being a geek, but i remember cyclone in a heman cartoon. they REALLY put over his spinning power.
first his arms spun, like torndoes, then his legs spun, like tornadoes, then he became a really big tornadoe and blew all the villians back to where they came from. i think he may even have been in shera instead but i cant remember which one.

Posted by
tin man @ 02/13/2003 5:30 AM EST
I heard a rumour Sy-clone was the end result of a charector creation contest. Any one no if there was any truth to it?

Posted by
Other @ 02/13/2003 6:09 AM EST
I had those erasers except for yoda and jabba! My royal gaurd one stuck around for ages…I bet it’s still around somewhere, though probably crumbling and chewed up and encrusted with dust bunnies. I used those as surrogate action figures.

Posted by
Scythemantis @ 02/13/2003 6:30 AM EST
regarding cyclone being a character created by a contest winner:
he wasn’t, but there was once a haracter contest, but the winners character was never made into a figure. look at http://www.he-man.org to find out more, and look at pics and stuff.

Posted by
tin man @ 02/13/2003 9:38 AM EST
Looking at the Star Wars noise I saw glow in the dark erasers. Why would anyone need that? You can’t write in the dark, so why would you want your eraser to glow? Or would you write with the light on, then run over and turn off the lights, then fix your mistakes? I’m so confused.

Posted by
guttercar @ 02/13/2003 11:05 AM EST
Erasers glow in the dark because it is neat. Who need’s an eraser that smells good or is shaped like an alien? No one NEEDS them, we just love them. You need to let go of logic and feel the force, dude.

Posted by
t-rah @ 02/13/2003 11:46 AM EST
I was trying to find out information on the he-man character contest. I was around six or seven years old when it was. I believe it was in the NY daily news (might have been in other newspapers in other areas of the US). I wasnt a winner but eventually they did make my character “Tung Lashor”. I remeber them sending me a Ram Man magnet and a letter and some other stuff, but of course my parents had lost (put in the garbage) the letter. Any info anyone has out there would be great. And just incase anyone was wondering why Tung Lashor was purple and orange and only had three fingers was because it was drawn by a six year old.

Posted by
Tung Lashor @ 03/26/2007 2:03 AM EST
Add A New Comment!
This entry was posted
on Wednesday, February 12th, 2003 at 10:06 am and is filed under General.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
