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11/18/2002: The Greatest Cereal Premium Ever

Well, the TMNT episode review is up, and I pretty much hate it. I’ve rarely liked an article that I couldn’t do in one sitting, and because of a crazy busy weekend, I had to do this one in slices for the past four days or so. Luckily the rest of the week looks clear, so I should be able to get the articles up more regularly as we segue into the Christmas season. I’ve got everything from He-Man’s Christmas Special to the Glo-Worms Christmas Special and beyond. Put any proper noun in front of the words ‘Christmas Special’, and rest assured, it’s on deck for the upcoming month. I did want to drop by tonight because I just uncovered an old commercial for what’s easily my favorite cereal premium ever: The Corn Pops Robots!

Actually, they’re not really ‘Corn Pops’ robots. They were given out with Apple Jacks and a few other of Kellogg’s more sugary cereals. Capitalizing on the success of Transformers, the small plastic toys weren’t all that inspired, but made up for it by being one very important thing: free. In a world of gooey wall-crawling spiders and sheets of scratch n’ sniff stickers, these wacky bots stood out big time. While they didn’t have the intricacies or style of the toys they were fashioned after, they did have one thing all their superiors lacked – an intense candy scent! Even though they came sealed in little baggies within the boxes, they couldn’t stop themselves from becoming inundated with that terrific fresh cereal smell. Now I’m not trying to imply that all robots would be better off if they stank like corn syrup, but for whatever reason, it worked with these little guys. Maybe because I was young and preferred chewing them to playing with them; I’m not really sure.

There were four in all, each slightly stranger than the last. The most prominent of the group was a knockoff USS Enterprise, a ship that turned into a robot with an immense dinner plate for a head. Then there was the lame blue shuttle that nobody wanted. He turned up in boxes the most often, because God hates us all. The third was an interesting red helicopter that turned into a very uninteresting robot with its eyes squished together. All of the figures were roughly the size of Go-Bots, and while the first three didn’t quite make me gush cartoony pink hearts out of my eye sockets, I will admit that I once tried to French kiss the fourth.

The final robot? Just your typical spaceship with tiny android arms. He wasn’t too impressive, but I loved him anyway. I used to pretend he was Cobra Commander’s secret spy – a guy who could infiltrate the GI Joe/Star Wars Rebellion camp undetected to collect secret information. I overlooked the fact that Duke and Luke Skywalker would’ve probably noticed a fully functioning spaceship the size of their torso flying around headquarters, but sometimes you’ve gotta forsake a little logic to make with the drama.

I’m not really sure why I felt I had to tell you this, but at least you won’t feel foolish if you end up in a conversation circle about the various toy robots given away as cereal prizes. See you tomorrow.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 20 comments

by far my favorite cereal prize was the alpha-bits monster heads. remember those? i still have a few of those buggers floating around the depths of the bottom drawer somewhere.

Ghosted by alex kidd @ 11/18/2002 11:33 PM EST


Favorite cereal prize ever – I can’t remember which cereal company was doing the promotion (Post, I think), but they were giving away free Fleer Ultra X-Men Sreis 1 trading cards. I got a Wolverine in a box of Cookie Crisp. It was the happiest day of my life.

Hey Matt – I remember a while back you mentioned doing an episode reveiw of the premeire of the new He-Man series. Whatever happened to that?

Ghosted by Voodoo Ben @ 11/18/2002 11:52 PM EST


I loved those little guys!

I wish I knew what happened to mine. I had them all but the helicopter. I actually had a couple of the space shuttle.

Ghosted by SuperRecoome @ 11/19/2002 12:38 PM EST


I didn’t review the new He-Man show because, as of yet, I haven’t seen much worth mentioning. I’m sure I will after seeing a few more eps, but the first one just seemed too similar to the original, and obviously, I don’t get anywhere near as fuzzy about it without all the memories attached. I did think the new Prince Adam’s nose was too big, though.

Ghosted by Matt @ 11/19/2002 12:48 PM EST


I had both of those featured in your snap shots. The copter and rocket thing. I had actually really liked the spaceship one, I remember playing with it nonstop because somehow I had convinced myself it was a Go-bot (I couldn’t afford actual Go-bots at the time, I suppose that was why).

Ghosted by Basic @ 11/19/2002 1:28 AM EST


Okay, am I the only one that thinks when the christmas decorations come down, Krang needs to keep the goatee? It’s like Evil Spock’s beard, but Krang’s already evil so the beard is just gilding the lilly. In any event, he looks like Burl Ives.

Ghosted by THomas Bombadil @ 11/19/2002 3:08 AM EST


in england we ever got those cool little robots in our cereal. (well maybe it was cos my mum gave me HEALTHY (read: horrible) cerial, and not that big box-o’-'candy’ type cereal that all you americans seeminly grew upon.)
But anyroad, i do remember my 2 favourite boot leg transformers ever.

One was a forklift truck keyring.

Every year whenever i went on holiday with my parents i woul see them in practically every single crappy tourist tat shop that he windy freezing rainy coastal town had to offer.

in my lifetime ive owned about 7. why?

they were always breaking.
thew transformation was cool. the robot mode looked really cool. but unfortunately, IT FELL TO FUCKING PIECES AFTER 5 MINUTES.

now of course that sucks ase ith a straw. so why did little tin man always want more? The packaging. It came on a card that had a really reall realy cool picture. it was like the makers spent more time on the pic than on the toy. (which i bet was true.) Many times the pics were different. or the colour was slightly changed. but what made me fall in love with this toy was the picture on the card the first time i saw it. It was a picture of out forklift hero, standing over the charred remains of 2 robots (who werent decepticons, honest) who looked suspiciousely like they transformed into tape recorder and a gun. (but of course they weren’t soundwave and megatron, oh no.)

The message was clear. I had to have that toy.

and then i had to have 6 more cos they were always breaking.

The second favourite bootleg transformer was an egg that turned into a vampire. how daft. it was part of a range of other monters and skeletons that turned into eggs.

how sily.

anyroad matt. i hope you remember to do your review of no holds barred before long. i csn wait for the review, as you know.

"GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR WHATS THAT SMELLLLL?"

Ghosted by tin man @ 11/19/2002 5:35 AM EST


My mom wouldn’t let me have any of the good cereals either. :P So I never, ever got a cereal premium. EVER!

Though I do think Matt needs to review the great Hulk Hogan movie, Santa With Muscels, since it’s getting close to Christmas. Best movie ever.

Ghosted by Speedy Service @ 11/19/2002 10:53 AM EST


Thanks, Matt, you’ve just shattered a little piece of my world.

I think it was a few days before (if not then a few days after) Halloween when I decided to get some Frankenberry or Booberry cereal. I tend to have problems with milk, but I was willing to risk them. Got some Frankenberry because I don’t like fake blueberry taste. The milk and cereal did not kill me. I’m now about to finish my second box and was planning to pick up a third tonight.

But the monster cereal only offer prizes if you send them money. Now I crave a cereal that will give me a prize–and not one of those free CDs inside. But I don’t think any cereals still have real prizes so I’m doomed to wander the cereal isle and leave unhappily without any.

It was so nice actually knowing what I’d have for breakfast.

Ghosted by Eve @ 11/19/2002 10:58 AM EST


On the x-mas poll, that Ralphie is the one from "A Christmas Story" and not the recently decapitated mafioso, right?

Ghosted by szyznyk @ 11/19/2002 12:34 PM EST


My favorite cereal giveaway was the set of glow in the dark bigfoot stickers. They actually had Bigfoot, Yeti, and a green guy that was a swamp monster. They came with footprints that trailed behind them.

I don’t know what kind of plutonium they covered those things in, but it has to have been ten years, and the things STILL GLOW IN THE DARK.

Kind of spooky, actually, because whatever is making those things still grow was really close to my fruit loops and is probably in my intestines somewhere to this day.

Ghosted by Casey Jones @ 11/19/2002 2:10 PM EST


I have color chaning flintstones dinosaurs in my fridge that have been there since 1990. Well, if you dont count the times we moved, but still, when we got into a new house first thing we did was get those dinos in the freezer.

A few months ago they gave a bunch of mini-beanies inside cereal. They had a disney set and a seaseme street set. Cereal is expensive, thrift shops are not, so I get all my lil’ beanie people at the thrift store. OO, and they gave out baseball head wobblers a few months ago too. So maybe cereal toys will make a come back.

Ghosted by Kennef @ 11/19/2002 3:08 PM EST


I’m glad someone else called them prizes, I was starting to feel like a retard. My favorite prizes though where the Cap’n Crunch infrared reader things, cause that meant I was able to search the box to find out where the treasure was. I soooo wanted to win!

Oh by the way, is it me or does Matt seemed to have chewed on a lot of his toys as a kid??

Ghosted by Willie T @ 11/19/2002 7:41 PM EST


Is dat you in da commercial, Matt? It so does look like you. It could be another whitye honkey sucka, but I don’t care.

We should get some hot wings sometime.

Ghosted by LeeRoy Alafonso Jenkins @ 11/19/2002 7:44 PM EST


Hey Willie T, you didn’t chew toys as a kid? They put all kinds of essential vitamins and nutrients into the plastic. It was part of a balnced breakfast.

Didn’t they?

Ghosted by Voodoo Ben @ 11/20/2002 2:47 AM EST


not santa with muscles, no. no holds barred. anyway. wrestlecrap.com will probably repost their swm review anyway.

Ghosted by tin tastic tin man of the rolling hills the prickly trees and all the little bunnies in the forest. arent they cut. look at their little ears. and their little fluffy tails. couldnt you just eat em? i could but only if i had brown sauce and mayonnaise to @ 11/20/2002 5:20 AM EST


I had the Enterprise one, I couldn’t believe it when I saw that pic. The Enterprise kicked much booty, but when the Klingons were extra tough, it was time for robot mode!

Ghosted by saboth @ 11/20/2002 9:10 AM EST


Holy damn, I remember these! I still have the space shuttle. I’d forgotten where I got it, but apparently I found it cereal. Too cool! LAST POST!

Ghosted by Chris @ 11/29/2006 1:35 PM EST


No! Me last post! HA!

Ghosted by Justin @ 02/27/2007 12:04 AM EST


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