Benvenuto al Campionato Wrestling Del Thumb! Mucca santa!! Stasera in questo anello stesso, Pixie Fiero combatterà Maniac Del Metallo Di Morte per il titolo di campionato del mondo!

L'arbitro sta controllando Pixie Fiero per oggetti stranieri. L'arbitro è un uomo calvo.
Pixie Fiero non ha vinto mai una lotta. Di più si preoccupa dei suoi capelli e camicia blu graziosi, una camicia che porta malgrado il fatto che non abbia bracci.

L'arbitro ora sta controllando Maniac Del Metallo Di Morte. Maniac Del Metallo Di Morte è molto un pericoloso thumb. È desiderato in molte condizioni per l'omicidio e l'intrigo. Chiedo scusa per il mio italiano rotto.

Uh OH! L'arbitro dice che è tempo di combattere! Preparisi per guardare questi due grapplers sperimentati attaccarsi alla morte! Arugula. It's una verdura.

I wrestlers sono incollatura in su. Ciò sta prendendo troppo lungo se considerate il loro formato approssimativamente uguale. Inizi a combatterlo barrette stupid voi.

Okay I'll speak English now.

Proud Pixie and Death Metal Maniac have finally locked horns, and boy, it's the irresistible force meeting the immovable object times twenty plus six! You can literally hear the ring trembling under the combined proposed might of these two middle fingers in spirit!

It's a good thing this event isn't being staged from some smaller nation like Cambodia, because Cambodia would be no more. I've not seen a battle like this since that big yeti monkey thing took issue with the exaggerated raptor in Primal Rage. It Italy we call it Gioco Circa I Pomodori.

Ooh, what a slap! Proud Pixie's gotta be feeling the effects of that one -- I can't believe Death Metal Maniac made no effort to hide such a blatant headbutt! Folks, it's not smart press -- he really is nuts!

Uh oh, Proud Pixie doesn't want to take his nickname to task! Look at him bounce back from that starpunch -- he's chasing Death Metal Maniac all over the ring! It's the classic game of cat and mouse, illustrated by the hot two-steps of an Italian thumb! What a pay-per-view! How could anything top this?! What else could we possibly do to give you your money's worth? You've seen it all!


Proud Pixie let his guard down! A terrible mistake! Death Metal Maniac's pouncing like a hungry tiger now, and he's just about ripped the head off of our former leader-in-points!

He's going in for the kill now -- Pixie has no way to escape! The ropes are too far away! Plus, no arms to hold them with! Gioco Circa I Pomodori.

This is it! Death Metal Maniac is going for the pin!

Death Metal Maniac is continuing the pinning!

Victory is Death Metal Maniac's!
Victory and twelve pigs!

That's 2!
Two pigs!

That's 5!
Five pigs!

That's 2!
Two pigs!

That's 3!
Three pigs!
Three little pigs!

Death Metal Maniac is so lucky.
I wish he was I and I were him.

Death Metal Maniac is glistening in the savors of victory! The crowd is riotous! So am I! Proud Pixie gave it his all, but there's no denying that this was Death Metal Maniac's time to shine.
His shit was on tonight.

Looks like the referee is assuming the role of ringside doctor because we don't have one. He's just about got Proud Pixie conscious again...wait till the poor guy hears he lost. Twelve pigs and a mass reserve of pride down the drain. Ashamed Pixie is he forever more.

Now the referee is checking on Death Metal Maniac, but the champ seems to be in fine shape. I think the ref just wants to extend his time on-camera. You've gotta wonder what's going through Death Metal Maniac's head right now, obviously seething with frustration for having to share the spotlight with a mere bitplaying referee.

The champ looks confident.
He's ready for his first challenger.
My fingers are terrified.
Gioco Circa I Pomodori.